Onesimus Smith

A Helpful Guide to Approaching Hot Girls Online

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If you really want to approach hot girls via the Internet, try meeting them in person first. A few middle-aged people I partied with, because I’m cool like that, told me how scary that first attempt of asking somebody out was during their times. You had to actually give a phone call to hot girls that have actually seen you in person. The fear of doing this is mixed with the possibility of a parent, sister or roommate answering the call.

However, sometimes you will realize this is not possible, and sometimes, you will be forced to approach a stranger online. Who hasn’t checked to see if we had any mutual friends with that Veronica Mars lookalike from a colleague’s album of one of those parties? Aren’t we all made of curious, horny wood?

So regardless if you know someone or you first became acquainted with them as a username, here are a few things to keep in mind for first contact.

If you are currently involved with someone, which includes being married and in a bogus Facebook relationship, you must know this is obviously a turnoff for most women. It’s 2012, not 3012, and we’re all not open to the conditions of open marriages just yet. You can try your luck though, but don’t say, “I’m married, but I love your tweets.” That sort of thing doesn’t really work with the ladies.

No matter how harmless you intend to be, refrain from using shortcuts to informality, like smileys, acronyms or using “ya” when referring to these hot girls. As in, “I was planning to send ya a short message.” It gets kind of hard to tell if you’re just easygoing or one of those mid-Western hillbillies in slasher flicks trying to murder all those people who come across their farm.

Lastly, anyone who is being approached knows that it gets awkward, so just be sincerely genuine, straight to the point, and nice. Also, don’t pretend that you have a question you want to ask. We already know you’re really not interested in our interior design services or to know what kind of candy we are if we were one.

I think it is safe to say that the Internet can be a great tool to meet people, but many of us are still hung up by how accessible we are. Like a lot of people out there, I just think most romantic intentions are more likely to translate better when done in person, after loads of liquid courage.

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