Myth Busting - The Player

Sep 13
07:38

2007

Damian Papworth

Damian Papworth

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Today's article is about some of the negativity which a man faces whenhe makes an effort to actively meet,Myth Busting - The Player Articles date and better understand women.Women are much better at discussing their romantic life with each otherthan men are, and therefore much better at learning from each other. However there are groups of men who have set up little communities, with the simple aim of learning how to better interact with women to producea more mutually beneficial and enjoyable dating experience. One suchgroup is further reviewed at the following link if you'd like more information:Dating Techniques For Men

There are so many negative connotations and generalisations when it comes to dating.  Its little wonder people find dating so intimidating at times.  If a bloke is too shy to approach a girlhe is called "weak", a guy who has the courage to approach a girl is called a player.  A girl who shows interest in meeting guys is called easy, one who shows no interest is called frigid. 

There are a whole range of other names which people are labelledwith when dating, some relatively benign, others not so benign.Regardless, all these labels have negative connotations, and instead of encouraging you to go out and meet people, to explore,they make you feel like you need to justify what you are doing,and the dating decisions you have made.

Today we are going to review the label "The Player".  Some of myfriends have semi regularly been called a player.  I can evenremember in a conversation about one of these friends, a womancommented "yes, I don't understand it.  Everyone calls him a player, yet no-one has ever seen him "playing".  It was a comment which I thought to be very telling in today's society.

The way men an women deal with dating situations is very different.  Women tend to be very good at sharing their experiences with each other, and therefore learning about menfrom each other.  Men on the otherhand are notorious for sharing nothing with their mates, other than in a bragging sense. 

There tends to be 2 reasons why this situation can arise. Thefirst is because men, in their groups of mates, tend to be very competitive, leading to displays of bravado. Also, men can feel that by speaking to their mates about whatreally is going on, they are somehow "betraying" their dating partner.  Afterall, "a gentleman never kisses and tells".

The problem this causes is that men often have nowhere to go,when they want to talk about their real dating issues.  Thereis nowhere they can learn from other men who are experiencing the same thing, and therefore learn about women and how to interact with them so that both you and your date enjoy a more harmonious dating experience.  And when men do break down the barriers between themselves, and do the unthinkable by discussing their dating experiences, reactions and issues, this is when they are often labelled "Players".

If you are a man and understand exactly what we are saying here,you need to realise that if you are genuinely interested in selfimprovement in the romantic part of your life, if you want to understand women better and interact with them in a more mutuallybeneficial way, you are not a player.  You are human, and you areallowed to discuss this with other men.  We have written more abouta group of men who have done, and continue to do this in a verycompassionate and successful way.  You can see this summary at the following link: Dating Techniques For Men

Remember, its not a bad thing to want to improve yourself soboth you and your partner have a more harmonious and funexistance together.  Just be honest with yourself, and forget about the labels other people sling about.  They are usuallymore indicative of the labellers mind space than yours anyway.

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