People get married for a variety of reasons:
There are many other possible reasons...! The one we want to focus on is "oneness." We believe that people get married to experience "oneness" or a "shared reality" with another human being.
When two people get married they have:
The idea of "oneness" is rooted in Genesis 2:24 --"the two shall become one flesh." The Revel Bible Dictionary (pp. 673-674) explains this phrase..."the two shall become one flesh" in the follow way. It suggests "the close bonding of individuals who love one another as equals and who can relate on every level of the human personality...[It] implies that husband and wife will experience the joys and sorrows of this life ... together."
We assert that "oneness" is achieved when each person:
"Oneness" is not a foreign concept for a believer in Jesus Christ. We are one with Him when we begin our "born-again" journey with Him. When we ask Him into our "hearts", we become "identified" with Him. This is a type of "oneness". God designed the marital relationship to project to the world the type of relationship we have with Him. When we fulfill this goal of connecting with our spouses (oneness), we give the world a tangible picture of what our relationships can look like (with another person and with God). Remember, we (the church) are called "the bride of Christ" in the New Testament. God's goal is that we experience this "oneness" in marriage. However, "oneness" is not always acheived. Or once it is acheived, it is not always maintained. We hope that the following exercise will be helpful to you. You can consider the questions yourself or perhaps you could discuss these with your spouse.
Exercise:
[Consider writing down your answers in a journal. Then, pray and ask God to help you grow in accepting your spouse. Ask God to give you the "grace" or "divine enablement" to understand your spouse better. Ask God to help you see your spouse with His (God's) eyes and heart. Ask God to solidify the idea that your way of doing things is not the only way to do things. You don't always have to be right or have the last word. Ask God to give you even more love for your spouse along with the courage and willingness to express that love consistently to him/her. Watch and see what the Lord is able to do in you!]We would love to hear from you about the exercises. Contact us at info@murphytoerner.comThis is a series which will be continued.If you enjoyed this article and are interested in more articles by this author and other free resources please visit our website www.murphytoerner.com. Counseling & Coaching Available: Call our offices @ 225.753.7773