Effective Conversation Through Listening

May 7
07:41

2010

Nyamache

Nyamache

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Conversation is a two way function. It will be effective if two parties talk each other. Listening is a more powerful tool of communication because one gets to learn and notice a lot from the words said.

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We have more real time communication tools at our disposal. Listening carefully to the conversation at any particular time will ensure effective communication. Communication tools range from mobile phones to Internet’s social network sites.

In the past,Effective Conversation Through Listening Articles we had telephones and telegrams. They were not readily available at our own disposal since they were immobile. One had to walk a distance in order to access telegram services.

But those days are gone and we are in a new era of technology that ensures communication any time. One of the most important tools of effective communication is actually silence. A bias of the mind, so to speak, is to conceptualize communication as purely proactive --talk, talk, talk replaces listening (hearing.)

Conversation is a two-way function. Careful listening will always make communication more effective. Those who have found themselves in the middle of embarrassing silences may find that the silence is due to poor listening skills.

Dale Carnegie emphasized this point in his best-selling book, "How to Win Friends and Influence People." While most people love to give in to the natural impulse to talk about themselves, it is often at the expense of alienating the audience. A question is a doorknob as it opens the portal to a conversation. And its key is listening. Every conversation has to start somewhere.

A good exercise is to fluff the wallflower at the next party you attend. A person leaning against a doorjamb silently wearing a "Save the Whales" tee shirt is a good start. Draw her out by being proactive. Go to her and ask about the shirt! An earful will no doubt follow, but listen closely and you will discover the source of the passion. It will net a new friend and a few new facts to boot.

A boring class is a good challenge. Try listening closely to the instructor. Notice the tone in his voice. Ask a question about the topic. By asking a question, you will be creating interest within yourself in the topic and energizing the speaker to make the lecture more interesting.

Children are superb to listen to. They will talk endlessly when they know that the listener has interest. It is quite a lot of fun to ask questions of them to see what incredible and entertaining things they will say next. One also will be amazed at how many astute observations children will often make. As the old saying goes, "From the mouths of babes...”

The lesson is to engage oneself in a conversation. Be a diary for the words of others. If one ensconces oneself in the words of others, one will get to know them all the better and be appreciated for the effort.