Everyone Needs A Stabilizer

A stabilizer is something that holds another thing steady, keeps it in place.  Stabilizers are an important part of many machines and devices.  Here are a few examples of physical things that are called stabilizers:

• Sway Bar in an automobile
• Flexible holder for a camera or smartphone to avoid jumpy videos
• An agent in explosives that keeps the chemicals from decomposing or exploding early
• Chemical additive to plastics to avoid degradation
• Fins on a boat to reduce ship roll
• Embroidery tool that supports the fabric and eliminates puckering

 There are also practices and processes used in many social and business areas to make things even and fair and avoid volatility.  Stabilization is used in finance, law enforcement crowd control, economic cycles, business operation and societal systems. 

 Stabilization is also important in people’s lives. It is necessary in careers, families, social interaction, team sports – actually it is essential in every aspect of a person’s life.  Unfortunately stability can be very illusive, especially for someone raised in a toxic family or working/living in a toxic environment. 

 Having a human stabilizer can make all the difference in how functional a person is and in the quality of a person’s life.  Everyone can benefit from having a stabilizer.

 My sister, Crysti, is my stabilizer.    As a matter of fact, I think she is the stabilizer for a lot of people – her husband, son, friends, employer, and church co-volunteers.  In the past she has volunteered and worked for non-profits; her stabilizing talent provided innumerable benefits to them.

 In case you want to find a stabilizer for your life, here are some of the qualities of Crysti that make her an excellent stabilizer:

• First of all, she grew up in the same household as me so she knows my history and therefore my triggers.
• She listens, truly listens. This means she does not just stay quiet until someone else stops talking so she can talk.
• At the core of any advice she gives is her genuine interest in the people and circumstances involved.
• She is guided by her empathy.
• An understanding that words and wording are powerful steers her comments and helps her help others formulate what they say.
• She understands that there are multiple points of view and potential outcomes in any situation.
• She makes herself available physically, emotionally, timely, whatever is needed.

 Thanks to all of these characteristics, Crysti has helped me stabilize my reactions, plans, approaches and emotions in business and personal situations.  I cannot count the number of times that she has kept me from getting myself in trouble or at least helped me have a better outcome. 

 In a world where stability seems to be constantly challenged, everyone needs their own stabilizer.  Everyone needs a Crysti.