It has been said many times that people are more afraid of speaking in public then of dying. Looking back on the speaker training I received I w...
It has been said many times that people are more afraid of speaking in public then of dying. Looking back on the speaker training I received I would whole-heartedly agree. As a new speaker I remember waiting for my turn on stage. The longer it took the closer I came to physical illness. It was a horrible experience. But, oddly enough, after just a few minutes on stage, the fear was gone. For a long time I did not speculate about that, I was just glad the experience was over. Now, decades later as a professional speaker and coach to those making speeches, I returned to that interesting phenomenon, the vanishing fear. This is what I have learned about managing that fear.
It’s a normal and necessary occurrence. It is what keeps us sharp and focused on what we are doing. It becomes a problem only when we cannot manage the level of fear, and it prevents us from speaking when it could be beneficial to our audience, our career, or our life. So, what causes this fear, and how do we deal with it?
At its most basic level, it’s a fear of being embarrassed or humiliated in public, a rather universal fear. But it’s also more then that. The real answer came from, Dr. Ilya Prigogine, a Belgian physicist and Nobel Laureate chemist noted for his work on dissipative structures, complex systems, and irreversibility. (Don’t worry, I’ll keep this non-technical.) Dr. Prigogine discovered that human beings (and every other self-organizing structure) organize themselves and grow by taking in energy and dissipating it to the environment. Stress happens when we are exposed to more energy then we can handle. Think of those times when you were given too much work to do in too little time. You became overwhelmed. You could not dissipate the available energy.
Now, think about all the energy involved in giving a speech. You have a lot of anticipatory energy to deal with along with some anxious energy about your content. These are the “what if’s” that the little voice inside your head is bugging you about. Then there is the expectation energy from the audience. It is definitely a high energy situation before you begin to speak and the energy does not have an outlet.
If that is not bad enough, think about where your mental focus lies. You are saying things to yourself like, “I hope I don’t make a mistake.” “Don’t flub that one line about…” “Are my clothes looking alright? In other words, you are totally focused internally on your fears and insecurities. Do you remember the viral movie “The Secret”? The main message of that movie was The Law of Attraction; what ever you focus your mind on, is what you get more of. So, if you focus on what is scaring you, what should you expect to get more of? That’s right, fear. And it’s fear that has no place to go. It’s little wonder that speaking scares the life out of people.
Let’s see, we start off nervous and then we scare ourselves half to death. How do we deal with this? It’s simple really. We just need five easy steps.