People with whom you surround yourself can make you, or break you. You may have been led to believe that the longer the friendship, the better the friend. Yet, that's not always the case. Yes, some friendships can be like fine wine—growing in richness with time—but some, just aren't meant to have a very long shelf life.
Have you ever felt drained after being around a certain person? Maybe you feel like you're walking on eggshells trying to cater to their ever-changing mood. Or for the most part, you have to go out of your way to explain your actions to them so they can understand your good intentions. Maybe they say they understand how you feel, but yet, their actions are contradicting. Whether or not their behavior is deliberate, bottom line is: you feel drained when you have to deal with them. Could it be that this relationship requires more care and maintenance than you're prepared to give?
People with whom you surround yourself can make you, or break you. You may have been led to believe that the longer the friendship, the better the friend. Yet, that's not always the case. Yes, some friendships can be like fine wine—growing in richness with time—but some, just aren't meant to have a very long shelf life.
Recognize that regardless of how long you've been together, if it's an unhealthy relationship, it can be a kind of toxic in your life; it can be a roadblock in your life preventing you from moving ahead to where you want to go. And if you allow it to continue, your mood will suffer in a way that not only sacrifices your own well-being, but also the well-being of others around you.
It can be hard to part ways with a friend or a partner, even when their behavior warrants it. While betrayal or seemingly deliberate attempts to be hurtful are clear signals that it's time to move on, sometimes the signal of the end of a relationship isn't that obvious. Furthermore, sometimes an unhealthy relationship can brew from two people who truly want to be kind to one another, but somehow along the way, they ended up on different pages; they don't agree with each other, and tension rises. This can be just as unhealthy. So what do you do? I guess this is where you have to use your better judgement...
If after a fair amount of consideration, you feel strongly about maintaining a relationship with this person, then be assertive and communicate honestly with them about what is working and not working for you in the relationship. Give it your all and kindly speak your truth, and allow them to do the same. And after this, if you still don't see any progress, at least you know you did your best and you wouldn't have left much room for regrets with "I should have" or "I could have."
Leaving behind an unhealthy relationship is one of the best things you can do for your well-being, as you make room for more positive, nurturing people to enter your life. As they say: When one door closes, only then can another door open...
In life, we'll all inevitably experience unhealthy relationships that challenge our minds and hearts so we can learn and grow. So learn from it, grow from it. But recognize when it is time to say goodbye. As you move forward in life, continue to give that which you seek. If you want relationships that enhance your life, help you to be your best, and encourage your dreams, then, offer this kind of friendship to another person. You'll get out of life what you put into it...always.
If relationships affect your health, what kind of partner should you choose?
Since relationships can affect your health, wouldn’t it make sense to choose a relationship that predominantly makes you feel good inside – choose to be with someone who adds to your life, not take away from it? So, how do you choose? Where do you start? And if you're already in a relationship, what can you do to make things better?
Being “turned down” is not so bad after all
Being turned down may have a negative connotation, but it is all in your perception. At closer look, it really is more of a blessing in disguise than anything. Here’s why.
Why is it sometimes so hard to do what’s best for you?
When you start to realize that you may very well be in a relationship with the wrong partner for you, how do you muster up the courage to let go – to do what’s best for you?
