How Billy Bob Got His Groove Back......I never thought I’d be writing in to one of these things, but after what happened last weekend with a couple of sweet little numbers I picked up, man I gotta tell ya.
The wife and I hadn’t been getting along all that well for the past year or so. She just hadn’t been in the mood for my after-the-ballgame-and-a-six-pack advances. I read in one of her ladies’ magazines she keeps in the bathroom that getting away for a romantic weekend was a sure-fire way to “spice things up”.
With that handy piece of information in mind, I planned us a camping trip. But, this wasn’t going to be like the ones we’d taken years ago. We used to just drive down the highway a couple hundred miles, stop at rest area and sleep in my ‘78 Trans Am. Not this time. We were going to do it in style.
I got on the internet and found a tent that hooked to the rear of my 2001 Hyundai Accent. They called it a “hatchback tent”, which makes sense when you think about it. They said it would turn my rig into “a comfortable cabin” – just what the ol’ lady and I needed.
I went to the city and bought a bunch of scented candles, perfumey smelling soap and a lacey outfit for her to wear. Things were shaping up pretty good, but then I started thinking that I didn’t want to pack the inside of the car with a load of junk, and besides those candles would give me headache if I had to smell them for the 50-or-so-mile drive it was going to be to KOA.
I got it in my mind I needed one of them carriers that looks like an old Big Mac box, so I could stuff all that frou-frou stuff in there. I went hunting around on the internet again and found a container that worked with my Thule rack.
I got that rack for a Christmas present from my brother-in-law. He’s some sort of hot-shot bicycle rider and said that he thought I might like to have it around. But, just between you and me, I think he gave me that thing so when he was in town, he’d have a way of hauling the bike he keeps at my folk’s house. I’m just saying.
Anyways, about a week after I ordered the stuff, it showed up at my door. Thank god, my woman was working down at the five and dime, and didn’t see all the trimmings. I strapped the box on and tested out the tent. Everything looked like it was going to work out just fine.
The next day, I got up early and painted some hearts and those little baby angels on the car with nursery school paint. I showed the new paint job to my neighbor and said the angels looked like retarded pigs, but he’s one of them book-reading types, so you can’t really trust him much.
I drove down and surprised the Mrs. at her work to whisk her away in the-now-read-to-get down ride. If you could’ve seen the look on her face. And, all her friends from work were hoot and hollering too.
Now, this ain’t that kind of article, so I’m not going to go into all the details, but let me say this – the shocks on the Accent needed to be replaced after that trip and Savannah and I are getting along just fine know. So, if you’re ever in one of those ruts, just slap a box on top, get a tent and some smelly candles and you’ll be back to business in no time.
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