Blind Date: How to Avoid Being Trapped in Reality TV
Blind dating has been around since almost the beginning of time. Even still there are many people who have a negative connotations It doesn't help that thanks to televison, blind dating has been taken to absurd levels of buffoonery.
In her 2005 article for USA Today Olivia Barker stated, "It used to be that blind dates felt, well, dated, practiced by the likes of Larry and Jack on Three's Company— and then not so successfully."
Blind dating has been around since the first caveman fixed up his buddy on their way to a brontosaurus hunt. While many blind dates have ended abysmally, there have also been a huge amount that have led to a second date, a deeper relationship and even marriage.
The stigma goes that most people on these types of dates are losers. Wrong! It's true that you may meet your shares of turkeys but it that does not have to be the norm. Besides, if people are so sure they are going to wind up being laughed at on some reality TV show because their date is a certified bean brain, then why do they keep going?
The answer is because they have a certain amount of trust in their friends and family. They know people close to them have no desire or intention to set them up with a loser. Plus for many of us it's a sense of adventure. Reaching into the grab bag but not having a clue as to what you will pull out is exciting. We go thru this ritual because as humans we are curious and hopeful at the same time. If it works out great if not we can say this is the last time we will ever go out on a blind date but deep down inside we know that is not quite true. Good or bad the thrill of the unknown can be exhilarating.
If you do go out on a blind date, keep a few things in mind:
1. Get that phone number
If your friends or family have fixed you up then make sure they have also provided the phone number (and vice versa). Why? Number one: to do a little detective work. This may not be necessary but if you have ever gone out on a blind date and the two of you really hit it off only to find out later that the other person was deeply involved in a relationship, you do not want to make that mistake again.
But the more important reason is just in case the other person does not show up. As you can imagine this is not an uncommon occurrence. Whether it's a case of nerves or an actual emergency is irrelevant, the point is you will never know without having a way to contact them.
2. Ready or else
How many chances do you get to make a good impression? One. That goes for the initial meeting as well as the actual date so make sure you are well groomed and properly dressed. Also show up on time. Nothing can get a date off to a bad start like showing up late. In a sense it is telling the other person you are not really taking this seriously.
Readiness also includes coming prepared with topics to talk about and being prepared to listen and ask questions. Avoid trying to dominate the discussion, however at the same time realize that just nodding your head and saying "uh-huh" is not going to cut it.
3. Say Goodnight
How did the date go? Let your observation and instinct guide you. If things went well then politely let the other person know and indicate you would like to do this again (don't be aggressive), if not then let them know this is probably your first and last date together. If they want to know why then state the reasons clearly and with confidence. Again be polite. It is better to do this than to be phony and tell them you will call when you know in the back of your mind you have no intention of doing so. Get it over with and do not string them along.
Blind dating does not have anymore or less stigmas than any other type of dating. What we see on TV is for rating purposes only. Just keep in mind to get their contact information, be ready, and prepare yourself for when the date comes to an end. When you do this, there is no reason why you cannot have a date that goes smoothly and a good time.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Article written by Daryl Campbell. What is the make or break point in most blind dates? The conversation. Find out 3 Tips to Avoiding Big Problems when it comes to dating small talk.