Finding Russian Mail Order Brides
Look around on the web, and you'll find plenty of sites that advertise Russian mail order brides. In reality, though, the term "mail order bride" is rather out-of-date. It's still used because it's just something that people are used to hearing and saying. True mail order brides haven't existed for about a hundred years.
Nowadays, a guy can't just pick a bride from a catalog and have her shipped to him, without either of them knowing anything about the other.
Back in the days of the wild west, men of the U. S. Frontier would usually outnumber women, so they'd try to hook up with a lady from back east. After a period of correspondence, the lady would finally go west, and the two would marry. Of course, without the speed of the modern Internet, this could be a lengthy process. Both parties were at the mercy of the Postal service, which was the only means of exchanging letters and photos.
Today's international dating services mostly operate on the web, and try to ensure the safety of both the men and the women involved. Their systems give the men and women the means and opportunity to get to learn about each other before they commit to each other. The better services will perform criminal background checks on the ladies before allowing them in. Here in the United States, federal law requires that any U. S.-based services perform a background check on the men. This law also requires that the dating services inform the foreign ladies of their U. S. Rights, in their native language, in case they get physically abused by the American men that they marry.
In general, these dating services deal with women in less developed, less prosperous countries, who want to meet men in more developed, more prosperous countries.
There are valid reasons for both men and women to become involved with an international dating service. For example, in the countries of the old Soviet Union, it's not always easy being a woman. Women vastly outnumber men. (Current statistics show that only 44% of the Russian population is male.) Russia has always suffered from this problem, and it was made worse by the casualties of World War II.
Many of the men who are there have problems with alcoholism. Many Russian women complain that the Russian men treat them as mere objects, and have bad hygiene. In spite of this, the Russian culture places intense pressure on its ladies to marry. Any girl who's still single by the age of twenty-two is considered an old maid.
Add to all this, that Russian women suffer from discrimination in the workplace. On average, the women only earn 43% of what their male counterparts earn, and are more likely to be unemployed.
So, with all this, it's small wonder that women from Russia, and other former Soviet countries, would want to leave in search of a better life. (Indeed, studies have shown that about half of all the so-called "mail order brides" are from countries of the old Soviet Union.)
Men who use these services generally have the opposite problems. In some places of the United States, men outnumber the women. Adding to the frustration, many American women have become focused on building careers, and have made the decision to either not marry or to delay marriage. So, after tiring of the domestic dating scene, many American men turn to the international dating agencies.
When a man joins one of these dating agencies and makes his choice from their catalog, he still needs to win the woman's confidence, and convince her to give him a chance. Having to do it strictly by correspondence, rather than face-to-face, can make that process a bit more challenging. (And, having to do it through an interpreter can make it even more so.)
Human nature is pretty much the same, everywhere in the world. So, the man will need to write his messages in a nice conversational tone, allowing his sense of humor to shine through. He'll need to be able to write more than just, "Hi. I'm a sensitive and compassionate guy. How do you like me, so far?" At the same time, he'll want to avoid certain topics that may cause the girl to worry about his morality or temperament. (For example, he should avoid talking about sex, and avoid asking for pictures of her in scanty attire.) A search on the web will turn up more advice in this area.
He would also want to woo the lady with cards and small gifts. He'll have to be careful not to overdo it, though, so as not to make her suspicious.
Many services also offer phone call services. The man can place a call and, with the assistance of an interpreter, converse with his chosen lady.
Once a couple hit it off via correspondence and phone calls, they'll need to meet. Most of the dating agencies offer tour packages, making travel arrangements for men to go to the girls' home country. For any American man who's serious about marriage, this is a necessary step. American immigration law doesn't allow the man to import a bride that he hasn't met face-to-face. Many dating agencies may also offer help with applying for the proper visas, to allow the girl to come to the U. S.
A man can also purchase a tour package without having begun correspondence with a lady. The package could include a party or two, where men and women are brought together. Generally, the women will far outnumber the men at these gatherings.
The obvious questions to ask are, "Do these international data services really work? Can a man and a woman from two different cultures, meeting through a dating agency, become part of a successful marriage?" Well, according to a report from the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services, approximately 4,000 to 6,000 marriages between American men and foreign brides take place each year, arranged by the "mail order bride" services. Surprisingly, the report also states that couples involved in these marriages tend to have lower divorce rates than the nation as a whole.
Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com
ABOUT THE AUTHOR