For girls only – should I ask him out?
Should a girl ask a guy out for a date? This is a tricky question indeed. Some guys love it, others prefer to do the chasing. And some guys may think it's an invitation for more than just lunch or dinner…we think you know what we mean…
Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider, authors of the best-selling book The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right, think the guy should do all the chasing.
In an interview by Amy Rachel Gerwitz on her website, the authors offer this old-fashioned piece of advice: "Regrettably, we state that going after men doesn't work! Men and women are biologically dissimilar period! Men thrive on challenges (sky diving, etc.) Women love to be protected and feel secure within routine. Thus, the man should establish the first point of contact for her to genuinely feel loved and protected. When a woman engages a man as the first point of contact, he will ultimately miss out on the opportunity of "getting the girl, or he will question the lack of challenge and end up losing interest".
Although we like to say there really are no rules in dating beyond being courteous, polite and having good manners, there's quite a lot of truth in Fein's and Schneider's take on whether a girl should ask a guy out first.
Whilst biology plays a part technically, reality tells a very different story.There is no bigger confidence boost a guy can receive than having a women go out of her way to claim him as her prize.This also gives women a sense of liberation by openly bucking this so called tradition.
A recent survey published by Hookmeup Online, tells of a growing number of single females who use dating websites and who commonly initiate contact with male members. A recent data centre report based on 238 online dating female members claim that 62% of these women fired of seductive or flirtatious emails to men, initiating the first move.
Evidently, the majority of men would like to be asked out by her. Asking out a girl for the first time rates as one of the most stressful components in a young mans life, because when she initiates things, it takes the pressure off. Subsequently, the man does not have to face the anxiousness associated with possible rejection.
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