The trick to getting your ex back is making them want you again. Isn't this why you got together in the first place? For some reason one of you stopped wanting the other which has led to your breakup problems. If you truly want to make up and get back together with your ex then you need to work on ways to make them love you and want you again.
The keys to fixing breakups are the wants and needs of your partner
Being in love is another way of saying that you want someone and need to be with them to satisfy your very basic instincts. Isn't this why you got together in the first place? When 2 people have this same need we call it a relationship or marriage but what happens when one of you stops wanting or needing the other? This is when breakups happen.
The key to a long and satisfying relationship is to keep your partner interested in you and to keep them wanting you. If your marriage has already broken down and you want to get back with your ex then you'll have to make him or her want you back. In other words you'll have to make your ex love you all over again.
Making up can only happen after you've broken up
If your relationship has got to the point where one of you wants to break it off then you know that your only hope of saving your marriage is to somehow make your ex love you again. If you go about it in the right way you can do this. You can make your ex want you back but it isn't going to happen overnight and it certainly won't happen if you start arguing or pleading or spouting your eternal love. In fact if you do that then you'll be making it much harder for you to get your ex back later.
Fixing a breakup by thinking outside of the box
Your instincts are going to tell you to put 100% of your energy into trying to change your spouse's mind while they are trying to break up with you. This is what most people do and it rarely works. You'll be much better off if you accept the fact that your marriage is over and start thinking about moving on with your life. I know that this sounds strange because I know that what you really want is to make up and get back together again. I'm talking about the state that your mind needs to be in to give you the best change of getting him or her back.
Here is a list of things that you must do right now that will give you more chance of getting back with your ex than most couples will ever get.
1. Make a clean break and do it with dignity
This is the hardest part. It's unlikely that you'll be able to stop the break up happening so roll with it. Agree with your partner. Tell your ex that it's the best thing that you both can do right now and that you've been thinking along the same lines for some time.
By doing this you will remove the conflict,
put your ex more at ease with you and leave the door open for you to make new contact later when the time is right. Now is not the time to make up but later is still a possibility.
2. Work on your appearance and your health - it will make you more attractive
Buy some new clothes - get your teeth fixed - work out at the gym regularly. Improving your appearance makes you more attractive and when you think about it you might just realize that you've been neglecting yourself a little lately. It's time to change all that by making an effort to make yourself look good.
3. Start dating again to boost your confidence
Confidence is an attractive quality in people and playing the field in the dating scene can work wonders for you. You might find it hard at first if you haven't dated for a while but it gets easier the more you do it and it's a whole lot of fun. Go on - enjoy yourself - make yourself happy because a happy person is an attractive person.
4. Make a plan to get your ex to want you again
You should be working on yourself and having a lot of fun for at least 30 days before you think about making contact with your ex again. By this time you should be thinking that you actually can have a life of your own and you're no longer desperate to get your ex back. If you still want to you can now begin the process of making your ex want you back but do it the right way. Don't just do whatever comes into your head. Have a plan. Understand what you are doing, what your objectives are and how you are going to achieve them.
If you follow these simple tips you'll be giving yourself a huge advantage and greatly improve your chances of getting your ex back. Remember - make a plan and stick to it.
