How to Mend a Broken Heart the Easy Way

Upon first glance, mending your broken heart seems impossible. After all, you're dealing with strong sadness, anger, and desperation that are changing how you live. Everything you've known and become accustomed to has turned on its head, AND the one person that you'd normally turn to in a moment of crisis is the very person who is causing this pain. So how can you possibly mend your broken heart - yet alone in an easy way?

You must abandon the mindset that triggers and perpetuate your painful emotions. Relinquish the "couple" mentality. By this, I mean you need to stop thinking as though you are part of a couple and instead see yourself as independent with your own life to worry about.

Think about it... here are some common thoughts that might trigger a familiar sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach:

1. Who will I spend my Friday night with?
2. I have to go alone to Thanksgiving dinner.
3. He/she was always the one I called right after I got out of work.
4. My bedside is empty.
5. Why should I cook dinner if I'm the only one eating it?

The above examples show your thinking in the relationship. Since you're relationship has ended, having these thoughts remind you of what you don't possess and rub salt into your broken heart.

In order to heal, you must start thinking like a single person. You're not missing your "other half." You're complete on your own; and you'd like to date your ex again, but you're not vulnerable because he or she no longer wants to be with you. If you can stop looking at yourself as part of a unit, you'll put yourself in a position to nurse your broken heart back to health. Otherwise, you're not allowing yourself to break the cycle in which every memory or routine stings an open wound.

This all sounds great theoretically, but how do you go about doing this? There are many secrets discussed in Bait Him Back and Bait Her Back, but I've included some quick examples below.

It's vital you cease contact for a substantial amount of time. Nothing perpetuates that "couple's mentality" more than seeing your ex immediately after your break up. Focus on yourself and your own interests, and that is nearly impossible if you're hung up on what your ex is doing.

For some people, you'll be surprised at what casual dating can do. Distraction is key. If you sit around in your pajamas all day reminiscing about the good times, you're impeding your growth. When you eventually make contact, you'll have nothing to say for yourself.

If your ex asks what you've been up to, you can't say, "I've just been missing you." That's a total turn off. It's much more attractive for you to evolve in spite of this setback rather than becoming victim to it. Show you've grown and added to yourself - and your ex will most likely regret their initial decision to break up with you. This is secret to having your ex want to be with you again.

Your heart can be mended and there are specific, easy, proven techniques to do just that. It's when your mind gets in the way that your heart stays broken.