Online Dating: Immediate Satisfaction Guaranteed?
We live in a time of instant gratification. We don't want things tomorrow or the next day. We want it now. That extends to online dating which has raised the expectation levels when it comes to relationships like few things before or since.
In the old comedy show Get Smart, Maxwell Smart tells his arch nemesis Siegfried that he needs to learn patience. Siegfried's reply? "I am patient. It's just that waiting bugs me." No doubt many people seeking to meet that special someone in cyber space can relate.
It's understandable. Never before has there been anything quite like online dating. The almost unlimited selection of potential dating partners, depending on which online service you use, coupled with the ability to instantaneously connect with someone who shares your same interests is a phenomenon that has revolutionized dating online and off. And all from the privacy of your computer.
The funny part is online dating has really taken off. Why is this a surprise? Mainly because it was not expected to do so well in a down economy. We all know how tough things are; yet many online dating services are reporting record memberships and more importantly for them record profits. No doubt the future looks bright for quite a number of these companies.
Yet you can visit countless forums where many people are upset because after a certain period of time they have not really met anyone. Others take it a little further and blame the dating service they signed up with. If certain dating sites are supposed to be the industry leaders when it comes to internet dating, then someone is lying.
In some ways they have a point. But one thing online dating has done besides transform the public scene is heighten people's anticipation level. A cornucopia of people to choose from (more than what has ever been available) should yield better results faster. In theory it should work just like that.
Sure the stories are true where a person goes online for the first time meets their dating partner and after several back and forths they decide to hook up offline. Things go great. The chemistry was more than either of them expected and before you know it they are strolling down the aisle listening to the wedding march.
For the majority? Not so much. Online dating for them is a time-consuming tough journey and it is for the same reason that makes internet dating the phenomenon that it is; too many choices.
One person seems to share the same interest as you but their looks just don't cut it as far as you are concerned. Another person does have the looks but your taste and there is so far apart that there is no way you can make a go of it. Someone else seems to be just what you are looking for but after several online chats it turns out you are not exactly what they are looking for. Now it is back to square one and you start the process all over again.
The thing to keep in mind is that because you have so many people to choose from that it probably will take longer to find that special someone. Therefore treat online dating like your own personal cyber club. Establish friendships and create your own social network. Above all put those instant success stories out of your mind. They only increase your stress level. "They did so why can't I" can easily become your mantra. Don't let it. Since you are on this online dating train, the best thing you can do is enjoy the ride.
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