Tofu Prayer

Recent rumor has him fully abandoning “That 70’s Show” in favor of trying a full on movie career. I’m all for it. Ashton Kutcher, who decided to stay with the show despite growing film success, is naturally pissed. But then Ashton never had any actual talent to begin with. With Topher, we’ve only scratched the surface.

In Good Company is a huge step in the right direction for him, as a corporate asshole who’s not really much of an asshole. He’s thrown into a position of wealth and authority far too young, and can’t think of anything more creative to do with his newfound success than buy a Porsche. He buries his emotional damage beneath a forced, congenial exterior as he’s barraged with personal and professional failures. It’s impossible not to like and sympathize with Topher, even when he’s playing the right arm of a faceless, life destroying, corporate monster.

He’s followed up his throwaway appearance in Win a Date with Tad Hamilton by showing up in a smart, low-key, Hollywood film manned by a proven, respected director/screenwriter. For your next trick Topher, stay away from lame animated voice-overs (don’t answer your phone if you receive a call from Madonna), avoid buddy-cop comedies, and run like hell if you should bump into McG. Take a lesson from your In Good Company costar Scarlett Johansson and simply pick good projects. Don’t go for the money, at least not at first. If you need a paycheck movie, do that later, after you’ve proven your mettle. Scarlett waited until last year to show up in The Perfect Score. By then she’d already been in contention for an Oscar.

Besides, you’re coming from a successful, long running sitcom that after you leave will still be on the air in heavy syndication. You don’t really need more money, unless you plan to form some sort of massive, rapper-like posse. For you though, I don’t think an entourage is the right idea. Here’s a good way to handle your career: Don’t take advice from Ashton Kutcher and don’t hire Dax Shepard.