Advice For your First Meeting with the Children

Relationship and parenthood advice professional recommend that a single parent wait until a love interest shows long term potential before an introduction meeting with their children.  Apparently you have passed the hard scrutiny a single parent can use to determine if you will be meeting their children.The reasoning behind this is to prevent subjecting children to unnecessary hurt from people coming and going in their lives; never to be seen again.  Children can be insecure if their parents’ marriage ended badly or if a parent has died.  A child can develop some real abandonment and psychological issues when significant people in their lives are not stable.Since you are looking for advice when meeting the children, we assume you are committed to making the relationship with the single parent a long term one.  If this is not your intention; perhaps this meeting is not a good idea.  Only you know the answer to this question.If you are prepared to become a part of these children’s lives; there are some advice tips for meeting the children that may make the encounter go more smoothly. On Neutral GroundChoose a relaxed neutral setting for the meeting.  Choosing a setting other than the children’s home; makes you appear less of an invader.  You may already be viewed as an intrusion into their lives before they ever meet you.  You should not compound this problem. Dating and parenthood advice professionals recommend meeting in a park or restuarant.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Sweet & ShortKeep the first meeting short.  This meeting will be awkward anyway.  By keeping it to a 1-2 hour time limit the first time; you can prevent over stressing everyone.PlanningYou should try to plan your meeting in a location that allows for some private conversation, yet has a little entertainment for the children.  A local park, recreation area, or play ground will give a nice distraction when children need a break.  It will also give you an opportunity to observe and interact with the children.Be YourselfChildren will pick up any insincerity very quickly (sometimes a lot better than adults do).  This can sabotage your efforts to develop a relationship with the children.  Rarely do relationships with singe parents last if a good relationship with the children is not established.  If you want to develop a good relationship with the children; dating and parenthood advice professionals suggest you be open and honest with them.  They may need reassurance that you do not intend to take their parent from them.Be PatientDating and parenthood advice books recommend you don’t force the relationship.  Advice when meeting the children includes giving yourself time to get to know the children.  This is a difficult time of transition for everyone.  Relax and let the relationship develop naturally.  Eventually, things will work themselves out as they are suppose to.