Pregnancy Ups and Downs

Bringing a child into the world is one of the most wonderful and beautiful experiences any person could ever have in their life. As I get closer to the birth of my second child, I am amazed at how far I can get from seeing and feeling that joy. I am sure that it is perfectly normal to be so focused on the to-do list and discomforts, but at the same time I feel guilty that I do not spend "enough" of my time and energy focused on the incredible milestone that grows closer by the day.
I have had an entirely normal and healthy pregnancy. I have not even been affected by gestational diabetes. I only experienced sciatica for a measly 5 days, and the biggest complaint I hold is consistent Braxton Hicks for the last 5 months. As any woman that has experienced these contractions knows as normal and mild as they may be, they are also incredibly annoying. After a day of contractions I am bound to be in an awful mood. Is it really so wrong that I am so affected by such a mild discomfort?
It seems like I make the situation worse for myself. The more tired I feel, the more I blame myself. No matter how many times my husband tells me otherwise, I am convinced that I am not doing enough. I expect myself to have the same amount of energy that I did before the pregnancy. I expect myself to be all-capable and never need a helping hand. So when I need assistance with dinner preparations, it is a major blow to my pride. It is a trap I keep losing myself in as the more help I need, the worse I feel about needing help. But feeling badly about needing help combines with my level of hormones and makes me a complete mess. Then I feel bad for crying over nothing.
But as crazy as I feel, I know that I am normal. I know that it is okay to be a little less capable. I know that expecting my memory to be up to par is ridiculous. Yet I still demand that perfection from myself. I consistently accomplish things that would be commendable from someone that wasn't growing another human, yet somehow I never see it as enough. My unreasonable expectations set me up for disappointment in myself. It makes me all the more thankful for my husband, who through it all has found a way to remain upbeat and supportive.
So I guess I am just too hard on myself. I know that if I could just relax I'd be able to focus a little bit more on the joys. Feeling my daughter kick my ribs would be a little bit easier if I wasn't so concerned about making sure I pick out the right car-seat, or panicking about the possibility that those Braxton Hicks contractions will lead to an early labor. My yoga practice and meditation time are keeping me sane enough that I can function -- my house is clean and my family is eating. I guess I just need to keep reminding myself that I am doing enough. Maybe by the time she's in my arms I'll be able to focus more on the joy my little girl brings than the difficulty I've been having with the effects of the pregnancy. If you're in the same boat as me just remember that this is a joyous time and try to focus on anything except for your weaknesses. They're never as big or bad as we think.