Toddler Discipline Books – The 4 Kinds of Pain Your Child Feels.
Many toddler discipline books explain how to discipline your child, but most will not discuss the fact that children are hurt in many different ways, more than what you would think. In most instances, these hurts are caused by parents ignorance of how sensitive children actually are.
But even more importantly to understand is the fact that these hurts release a stress hormone in the brain which can cause your child to be unfocused and even agitated.
Parents tend to forget or just do not know how sensitive their children are, not only in what they see and hear, but what they feel as well. So here are the four kinds of pain that children experience that can affect their behavior.
Aggression. This not only includes the aggression that they receive from their parents, but also from siblings or other children. Hitting or spanking as well as yelling are all forms of aggression. This is where the strict disciplinarian will often hurt their child through aggression and even domination. Instead of treating their child with respect, they order their children around for no other reason than they do not understand that there are other ways to discipline their children.
Negligence. This is a lack of attention and of a nurturing atmosphere and even a lack of stimulation. Or, this could also mean an atmosphere where your child is overly stimulated without you even knowing it. By leaving your baby or toddler in front of the television while you do other things opens up the possibility of over stimulation by what they are watching on the screen. And as your children grow older, they are bombarded by sights and sounds of violence on the television. By sitting them in front of the tube while you do other things subjects them to all sorts of things that they tend to imagine that they could be in that same situation.
Life Changes. There are some things that we have no control over such as accidents or natural disasters. However, things such as changing schools or divorces are things that we can control, but are sometimes unavoidable. Life changes are difficult for adults, so imagine how difficult they are for children.
Hurts from birth. This can range from a breached birth experience to fetal distress, even Cesarian section delivery. These can have long term effects on a child, which can include problem behavior.
I know firsthand about this type of hurt. I was seven months pregnant with our son when we were involved in a serious car accident. I suffered a serious head injury and went into labor right away, but the doctors stopped the contractions. He was born on time at full term, but he has always displayed a short temper and mood swings. It has been shown that the trauma that I went though while he was still in the womb has played a huge part in his behavior problems.
There are so many different experiences that your child has to try to process, and they can pick up the littlest amount of stress, not only while away from home, but while at home as well. You can help to keep this stress to a minimum by making sure that they do not feel these types of pain.
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