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Ways to Handle Impulsivity

Impulsivity is reacting to a situation without considering the consequences. People who are overly impulsive, seem unable to curb their immediate reactions or think before they act.

The tendency to jump into a situation without thinking or making a plan of attack characterizes the impulsive child. This behavior is evident in approaching academic work and everyday life. Helping the child control impulsivity may require consistent and concerted effort from everyone concerned. Modeling rather than talking through control techniques should be used.

When other people do not understand the reasons for this behavior it often leads to rejection and criticism from others. Impulsivity can therefore lead to social isolation as the person alienates existing friendships and cannot make new ones.

Impulsivity often arises in situations where the person is confused or fearful. These can be minimized by a predictable daily schedule. Also any outbursts should not be automatically written off as impulsivity and ignored. It may be indicating a cause of fear or confusion that needs to be dealt with. When lack of awareness is not an issue the person may apologize later. Try to be sensitive to this despite any lingering anger or annoyance on your part. Prolonged complaints about the behavior afterward are not likely to help as usually their lack of control was not by choice on their part.

Try to remember it is the impulsivity that is at fault, not your loved one. Generally they will not be speaking or acting intentionally to annoy you or hurt your feelings. Separating the person from the behavior can go a long way to coping with the situation.

Dealing with impulsivity

• It is possible that a behavior is a response to something that needs your attention. Don't be too quick to discount it as an outburst.
• Stay calm. This will help you remain able to think and not react emotionally and impulsively yourself. In addition, staying calm may help the person calm down.
• Let the person know that yelling is not the best way to get your attention and offer alternative methods for getting your attention.
• Remember, although the things being said are hurtful or embarrassing, generally the person is not doing this intentionally.
• Medications may be helpful for outbursts and physically inappropriate behavior. Talk to your physician.
• Before starting a new project do your thinking on paper. You will make quicker and better decisions if you write down the pros and cons of a line of action. This doesn't take time, it saves time.
• To avoid impulsive purchases at the grocery store, plan your meals out before you make up your shopping list. This will also save time because you will know exactly what you need to buy.

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