Talk Like A Pirate

Ooh Arr, Talk Like A Pirate!

Ahoy landlubbers, it's International Pirate Day on 19 September - slap bang in the middle of the week this year, so ye may have to wait till the weekend to celebrate it properly with a classic pirate themed party.

So, you and your mates have pillaged some cheap pirate costumes.  You’ve gone for the Johnny Depp look: caked on oodles of eye shadow, slapped on a plaited beard & emptied a bottle or rum or two to perfect that sexy swagger.  Set sail for the party, right?

Wrong! 

What you’re forgetting is one of the most important aspects of any pirate costume: the lingo!

Any self respecting buccaneer will make sure he or she can pass as a pirate in all ways possible, and that means audio as well as visual.  What good is it being dressed to the nines in a striped shirt, black waistcoat and hooked hand if you utter a few too many “please and thankyous” and blow the whole disguise?  Below is a thorough A to Z guide to pirate talk.  See if you can learn a few before your buccaneering buddies and nasty neighbours swing by and board your establishment. 

Good luck, me hearties! 

• Ahoy: hey/hello
• Arrrrr: suitable for virtually any situation: yes, I agree, I’m happy, we’re going to win, I like this beer…
• Avast ye: stop, listen to me!
• Aye: yes, sure thing
• Aye aye: I’ll get right to it (as soon as my break is over…)
• Beauty: term of address for a lovely lady. Opposite of “wench”
• Bilge rat: insult (the bilge is the lowest, dank & musty part of a ship. A rat is a rat)
• Booty: treasure. Not to be confused with “bounty”, which is the price set upon the head of a particularly villainous pirate
• Buccaneer: a sear-faring fellow who lives by his own laws, AKA a pirate
• Cat o’ nine tails: nine-headed whip for floggin’ mutineers. Ouch
• Davy Jones’ Locker: bottom of the sea, where dead men lie
• Doubloons: pieces of gold
• Gentleman o’ fortune:see “buccaneer”
• Give quarter: take mercy by not killing an enemy pirate. Thus “give no quarter!” may be yelled by a vicious, fearsome pirate captain
• Go on the account: to embark on a pirate cruise
• Grog: alcoholic drink. Remember this one if nothing else…
• Jolly Roger: classic pirate flag, skull & crossbones on black background
• Landlubber: land lover, not a pirate - an insult
• Lass:woman
• Lily-livered:faint o’ heart – an insult
• Long clothes: posh clothes, not suitable for a pirate (who needs to be free to run, jump & pillage)
• Matey: shipmate or friend
• Me hearty: as above
• Me: my
• Pieces of eight: pieces of silver that are cut into eight and used as small change
• Poop deck: nothing to do with poop, unfortunately: the deck at the back of a ship, above the captain’s quarters
• Scallywag: bad person/scoundrel
• Scurvy dog: a classic pirate insult!
• Shiver me timbers: exclamation of surprise
• Sprogs: young, inexperienced recruits. AKA kids
• Squiffy: buffoon
• Swashbucklin’: the noble act of fighting on the high seas
• Sweet trade:piracy
• Swing the lead: be lazy/not pull one’s weight (swinging a lead weight to measure the depth of the sea was one of the easier jobs aboard a pirate ship)
• Thar: not here
• Walk the plank: punishment for foes or deserters. Possibly a mythical punishment… but who cares?
• Wench: lady (not a particularly pleasant term – opposite of “beauty”)
• Yellow Jack: flag to signify illness (possibly useful for your vocabulary at the end of a night…)
• Yo ho ho: pirate laugher. Often followed with “and a bottle of rum!”

 Finally, here’s a fistful of daring chat-up lines.  Use at your own peril.

• Avast, ye beauty! Want to know why me Roger is so jolly?
• Come on up and see me urchins!
• Arrr, I like the look of that treasure chest ye be boasting.
• That thar is some fine pirate booty.
• Prepare to be boarded!