Recreational Vehicle Obsession or RVO
If your wife believes she lives in a motor home because you are in
the witness protection program, you might have RVO. Yes, that and many other symptoms of the dreaded Recreational Vehicle Obsession is discussed with the seriousness the topic so richly deserves.
With heavy heart and no small amount of trepidation I must share with you a new medical condition from which I unfortunately suffer. While some had previously noted symptoms, they did not fully manifest until last week. Once you read my account of this truly regrettable situation you will immediately recognize that I am definitely suffering from the malady.
There I was stopped at a red light when a gorgeous blonde crossed the street right in front of me. Of course I was watching this lovely young lady when out of the corner of my eye I spotted an RV. What a dilemma. Do I continue enjoying the lovely young woman or check out the RV? I wound up eyeing the RV and that was the final proof, I'm suffering from a major case of RVO. In case you are wondering, RVO is more technically known as Recreational Vehicle Obsession.
Without a doubt you wish to know whether you or a loved one has succumbed to this dreaded new disease. Read on for indicators while trying not to think about Jeff Foxworthy.
If you have more than a nodding acquaintance with Wal-Mart greeters in three states, you might have RVO. If you've ever walked to the back yard and spent the night in your motor home, you might have RVO. If you've ever seriously considered cashing in your 401K to buy a motor home, you might have RVO. If the last time you saw your grandkids was at a Flying J in Midland, Texas, you might have RVO.
If your wife believes she lives in a motor home because you are in the witness protection program, you might have RVO. If it takes more than twenty seconds to answer the question; "Where do you live?" you might have RVO. If you pass on the Victoria's Secret special to check the water level in your coach batteries, you might have RVO.
If your idea of winterizing is driving south, you might have RVO. If you forgot your wife's birthday, but celebrated your RV salesman's fortieth with a candy gram, you might have RVO. Now you know.
So what does a dedicated RV owner (and RVO sufferer) do when circumstances require a short respite from the road? Go to an RV show of course. I go to RV shows for two reasons: to see what I can't afford and to get anything that's free. The answers are usually lots and not much. I once lingered over the inflatable hot tubs, but my RV couldn't carry an extra coffee mug. Nevertheless, I enthusiastically recommend RV owners and hopefuls check out every RV show possible. It is great fun to see what's new and dream of tomorrow's possibilities.
STUPID CAMPER TIP: Your RV is tall. Doesn't seem like much of a tip does it? Read on: It seems my neighbor purchased a brand new class C RV. By way of celebration he invited half a dozen neighbors to pile in for the short excursion to a local restaurant. He was proudly explaining all the great features of his brand new RV as he pulled into the restaurant, literally. You see my neighbor wanted to do the gentlemanly thing and drop off his guests at the front door. Unfortunately driving to the front door meant driving under a brick portico (otherwise known as an overhang) and you guessed it. The brick portico ripped his AC right off the roof.
See you on the road RVO sufferers everywhere.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jack Kean is an author and columnist who frequently writes about his RV experiences, English Bulldogs and retirement. Many of his columns are humorous. Also some great travel photos and English Bulldog pictures on the web site. A tip that could save you thousands on the purchase of a new RV is also available. http://www.keanwriter.com