Never Get Divorced Without a Lawyer

Don’t get divorced without a divorce lawyer to represent you, even in a friendly divorce. Divorce is complex and can be an emotionally crippling time in anyone's life. It’s not a good time to make life changes or to make any major decisions for that matter, without some legal guidance to protect you, especially when you’re likely to be confused, angry and emotional regarding the changes being thrust upon you. 

The best time to consult a divorce lawyer is before your soon to be former spouse does so. If your marriage is heading south, it may be time to find out what your rights are and what you can do to protect your fair share of the marital assets. Unfortunately divorce can bring out the worst in people and that can mean lying about or hiding assets in order to keep a spouse from their fair half of a fair split. Being the second person to hire a divorce attorney can put you at a disadvantage because you will not, unlike your spouse, have had time to prepare for what is coming at you next.

When you consult with your divorce attorney you need to remember the function of your lawyer is to help you preserve your legal rights to property, assets and child custody if it applies. Don’t use your lawyer as a counselor or a sounding board to vent on. Consult a counselor to help you move through your anger and pain and use your legal time for its intention- legal guidance.

Don’t rack up anymore legal bills than necessary by misusing your time with your lawyer to vent about your feelings towards your ex, it’s not a productive use of your time or money. Your legal representation needs to know about assets, what they have, what you have and what you want to have. 

And here is the crossroads where your divorce can become civil, goal orientated and simple or complex, angry and drawn out for literally years. As your mother probably told you when you had kids- pick your battles. 

And consider what you want to have carefully. Do you really want to spend $500 for your attorney to battle with your former spouse’s attorney so you can have $28 worth of fishing equipment? Take a step back and reassess what you are battling for. Yes, you will annoy your ex by picking apart the divorce every step of the way. And you will definitely get to know your own divorce attorney incredibly well- but you will also make this painful episode of your life longer than it needs to and make it more expensive than necessary in the process. 

Your goal should be to end a relationship and leave the relationship in no worse financial strait than when you entered it. If you are willing to do that you may find your ex is also willing to bend and you can end things without making your divorce lawyer rich and making yourself miserable in the process.