The first step in our how to get a divorce tutorial is to ask you: are you sure that this is the only option? Have you tried therapy, couples counseling, a long vacation to "get back on track",
Copyright (c) 2008 Steven Magill
The first thing you should do when you decide to get divorced is to talk to a lawyer. A lawyer will be up to speed on all of the current divorce laws in your state and can help you fill out your divorce paper work. Some couples are determined to save money and not use a lawyer; they are convinced that they can work things out amicably. The sad truth of the matter is that no divorce is easy-no matter how amicable the split is. If you are convinced that you won't need separate lawyers to negotiate your divorce for you, you might want to try divorce mediation.
Divorce mediation still feels new but it is quickly becoming accepted as a way to dissolve a marriage amicably. There are several different kinds of divorce mediation, but the main idea is that both spouses sit down with one lawyer who is the mediator and together the three of them decide how everything needs to be divided, who gets custody of the kids and the lawyer makes sure that everything is done to the letter of the law and that the papers are filled out correctly.
Here are some of the major reasons you should try divorce mediation:
Mediation is much easier for your kids to process. Divorce is hard enough on kids, but when they know that their parents are at odds with each other and might be behaving badly toward one another, the trauma for the children is far worse. Divorce mediation shows your kids that you and their other parent are still a team-working together to make the decisions that are best for everybody and not putting them into the middle of a volatile situation.
You can save money by using divorce mediation. Because both parties use the mediator, they can split the cost between them, which makes the expense much far more manageable.
When using divorce mediation, the spouses are allowed to follow their own time schedule. They aren't required to set court dates or schedule lawyers. Instead the divorce is processed one division at a time. It is cooperative not antagonistic.
When you use divorce mediation, the mediator completes your paperwork for you. The mediator is also an attorney and this person can make sure that you are using the most current forms and that they are filled out correctly. They can even file your divorce papers for you and you are then free to represent yourself when your court date comes.
You get the same legal information with divorce mediation that you would get if you and your spouse each got your own lawyer. This way, however, there is no guesswork as to what your spouse's lawyer is persuading him/her to do. Working with a mediator keeps everybody on the same track and working together. It turns your divorce into a project, not a confrontation.
It is important that you end your marriage in the most diplomatic way possible. Divorce mediation is a way to make that happen.
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