The art of spelling

People say that children these days never learn to spell. Well, to be honest I am not sure I did either until I became a journalist.

I went to a very good, private girls’ school and I know they constantly corrected my spelling and grammar but much of it didn’t sink in until I started working for a newspaper.

There, I had a wonderful news editor who not only taught me how to write news but also how to spell.

So bad was I, that he kept a kind of hall of shame of my faux pas, some of which I will share with you now:

• Loan parents (instead of lone)
• Sceptic fingers (instead of septic)
• And – my personal favourite – my report of a curb crawler (rather than kerb crawler) after a particularly juicy magistrates court case.

Anyway, rather like a reformed smoker can’t stand the smell of cigarettes, I became an utter pedant when it came to good spelling and good grammar.

I think it is our obligation to preserve the English language and the highlight of my work is not only writing but proofreading and editing copy to make sure it is word perfect.

So, here’s a challenge, how many misspellings can you find in the next few paragraphs? Just how good is your spelling?

Once upon a thyme, their was a little girl called Goldilocks. When out walking won morning, she stumbled across a small cottage in the woulds. She waited at the edge of the curb before she crossed the rode and, reaching the door, she went inside.

There on the table was sum yummy porridge. She new the storey already, so she didn’t bother with the too hot and two cold bowls but went straight four the ‘just write’ bowl. She scoffed the lot.

Tyred, Goldilocks decided to sit down on a chair. One was two hard, one to soft, the other just write butt – you’ve guessed it – when she sat down it broke into tiny peaces. “What a terrible effect I am having on this place,” thought Goldilocks, as she slowly went upstairs to the bedrooms, glancing in the mirror as she did so (she was terribly vane!).

Off she went to sleep in the tiniest bed, and was so out of it she didn’t here the three bares coming back.
“Fee, fi fo!” Sorry, wrong fairy tail. “Whose been eating my porridge? Grate! Its all gone.”  ... etc

Anyway, to cut a long storey short, they found her, woke her up and she dived out of the window, opening her parashoot for a soft landing. She ran off, never to be scene again.

Now silly, as that tale is, it illustrates the depths, breadths and potential pitfalls of the English language. Not many of the words in the story will show up on a spell check (because they aren’t spelt incorrectly) but they are still the wrong versions.

So, why do you need to know how to spell and punctuate? Well, for one thing, in business, a badly spelled letter, newsletter or website could alienate people. Not just pedants like me but others who will think that shoddy spelling equals shoddy work. If you don’t look professional, people may think you aren’t professional.

And if you don’t trust yourself to write or proofread your own copy, then hire a professional (such as myself) who will do the job for you, freeing you up to concentrate on what you are good at – running your business.