Online Dating Safety: Message Overload

Jan 16
09:58

2009

Daryl Campbell

Daryl Campbell

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They like contacting you on a steady basis and for the most part you don't have a problem with it. Yet too much communication no matter how good it seems can mean something else all together.

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There is something about meeting that special person online and being pleasantly surprised as the conversations between the two of you flow more naturally. You discover the other person so easy to talk with that you find yourself sharing more details about your life than you have ever done with any of your previous relationships; whether they were online or off.

The times between logging off to take care of business and logging back on to reconnect with each other passes way too slow for your liking. And it's pretty obvious that they enjoy it also. The online chats last for hours. Even then it seems like the two of you can go on for a lot longer.

So what's wrong with that? Nothing if both parties continue to initiate the messages on an equal basis. But all too often,Online Dating Safety: Message Overload Articles it becomes a one way street in that one person starts to do way more messaging than the other one. Sure the two of you may be still under the impression that the relationship is still on that plateau of almost limitless discussions and chats.

But time has a way of removing the rose colored glasses that come with relationships and emotions and replacing it with candid observation and analysis.

Too much messaging could mean:

1. Desperate

At first it was such a wonderful discovery how much you too had in common. Now due to excessive messaging it strikes you that maybe you both have a little TOO much in common. You agree on almost everything. Now even with being restrained in the number of times you contact each other, the two of you really may be that compatible.

However when it feels like there is no time to digest the information from the previous conversation before a new message pops up, then that just opens the door to the thought that maybe one of you wants this relationship a little too much.

2. Needy

How are their emotions doing when you do not get back to them post haste? Do they start to gush a little too much about how they missed you. Or do they get agitated?

This can take many forms such as sarcasm, becoming less talkative or just letting you know how upset they are that you didn't get back to them. If they are having a hard time dealing with the fact that you have a life outside of cyberspace then tread lightly.

3. Personal Darkness

Yes this is extreme; unfortunately it has been known to happen. Too many messages can mean they are trying to drag you into their own private nightmare. That could be anything from running a scam to separate you from your money or something more sinister.

Thankfully it's not a common occurrence but when it comes to dealing with someone who for all intent and purposes is still a total stranger, you have to take extra steps to guard your safety.

Your online relationship might be the real deal and lead to something wonderful between the two of you. But it's hard to assess that if there is no breathing space to allow the natural give and take of the relationship to flow.

Even if your internet dating partner is not desperate, needy or trying to drag you into their own personal insane asylum, both of you are still jeopardizing the relationship.

Too much of a good thing too fast can eventually make you sick of it. You may like hamburgers and hate hot dogs but after a steady diet of overindulgence, the hot dogs start looking better and better to you.

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