Stop The Pipe Dream and Get Over Your Ex

Feb 5
09:08

2009

Daryl Campbell

Daryl Campbell

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Sure it seems like a great idea. So you expend a fair amount of time and energy formulating your plan. For you the relationship that you and your ex shared was as good as it gets. Even when things were not going so well, it didn't bother you too much. You knew the make up phase was going to be like a volcano loaded with honey. So from your perspective it's quite understandable that you want this relationship back.

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You've laid it out like a general planning a battle campaign. You've checked with your field commanders formally known as your friends and family. A few of them think it's a brilliant strategy,Stop The Pipe Dream and Get Over Your Ex Articles others have been frightfully indifferent and most have just laughed at you while suggesting that maybe you should use that health care plan your job provides and seek some kind of professional help.

You scoff at them. That's why they were never promoted beyond corporal. It's you who will have the last laugh when your plan is carried out and your ex comes back to you.

Congratulations on your strategy. There is just one minor detail you may have overlooked.

Your Ex

Your plan calls for you to re-woo them. Let them know in no uncertain terms that things are different but all the good stuff that was in the relationship will remain as is or get even better. The problem is your ex made it pretty apparent that they have no interest or want to start the relationship again.

As a matter of fact your plan in all probability will have the opposite effect. It acts as a clear indicator to your ex that you do not respect them. You want what you want and that's all there is to it. In essence the relationship was all about you. Your ex just happened to be an innocent bystander. If nothing else, this could in their mind reignite all the reasons that they broke up with you.

Nothing says selfish like the refusal to respect someone's decision making process.  If time and giving each other the necessary space brings the two of you back together that's one thing. But to force the issue by continually pushing emotional buttons or flat out manipulation is another. Whatever chances you had of getting your ex back will disappear right before your eyes. When they let you have it full force it will not be one of those phases they are going thru. The hostility and unforgiveness will be lasting and permanent.

If you ex has in some clear way left the door open than that's one thing and even with that you must be careful to tread lightly. Forcing the issue in any way can shut the door on any hopes you had of getting back together.

But if they have said it is over between you and them then you must respect that. If they do not want to be with you; then you can rest easy because there are many people who will jump at the chance to meet the magnificent you.

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