It’s interesting that the Founding Fathers didn’t describe our inalienable rights as life, liberty and happiness, but the pursuit of happiness. They were onto something.
It’s while you’re in the process of getting what you want that you have the most profound experience of life flowing through you. Of course, you’ll find pleasure in the outcomes—richer relationships, health, inner peace, confidence, wealth, etc.
But the greatest joy in life is found in the hotfooted pursuit of happiness—reaching, stretching, creating, learning—and delighting yourself with what you can achieve and how smart you’re becoming.
As you’re getting the hang of how the process of finding fulfillment works, there are 4 questions you can use to get the most leverage out of each desire.
1) How much passion does this desire inspire in you? Passion brings its friends imagination, creativity and boundless energy to the party.
The desire that inspires deeper passion will bring along more of the resources you need to fulfill it. Thus, the strongest desires swing the biggest crowbar, giving you the leverage to get what you most want with less effort.
2) What’s the meaning behind what you’re pursuing? Every desire consists of a least two layers. This surface layer consists of a physical object (like a car), or a tangible acquisition (like a job).
The second, deeper layer consists of the flavor(s) of happiness you’ll feel when you have it: secure, free, joyful, fulfilled, peaceful, gratified, loved, etc.
When you connect your actions to the feeling you want, then your passion (and its friends) greases the skids. It’s so much easier to get what you want when your enthusiasm carries you along, spawning one brilliant idea after another until you’ve finally got it.
3) Will you have to stretch yourself a bit in order to pursue this desire? Woven through every strand of your DNA is the drive to learn and grow. You'll tap into your creativity to figure out how to get what you want. Your confidence will grow. And it feels good.
So good, in fact, that it’s addictive. The more you get, the more you want. The best part is that the more you grow, the more able you’ll be to grow more. The more tools you’ll develop—confidence, clarity, resourcefulness and wisdom.
4) Is this desire exciting, but a little scary, too? As my avid readers know, fear is your signal that you’re stepping out of your comfort zone; you’re taking a little risk.
A 2-ton boulder falling from the sky onto your head is scary. A speck of dust, not so much. The key is to break down a risk enough that you can move forward.
Living in fear keeps you stuck. Taking zero risk gets tedious, boring and defies your DNA. You don’t get wiser by doing nothing. Wisdom comes from taking calculated risk.
Think it through. Break it down into manageable steps. Then take one baby step after another. You’ll get there.
Joy is the basis of every kind of happiness you can pursue, so enjoy the pursuit. When you achieve your desire, a new one will be born. Again and again. As long as you live.
Six Things Your Life Coach Doesn't Want You To Know
There are many confusing and false messages bouncing around in cyberspace about life coaching. After coaching 600 people over the past 13 years, talking with dozens of coaches and surfing the websites of about 100 more, I'm sharing my take on what coaching is—and isn't. I'd like to say upfront that my intention is not to offend or denigrate. I'm simply stating my informed opinion, which is best taken with a grain of salt.
The Creativity Bone’s Connected to the Confidence Bone
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Do You Know the Difference Between Boundaries and Walls?
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