Karen Keller, Ph.D.

Top 5 Habits Holding You Back … From Everything

The best learned lessons come not from your success, but from your failures. Actually, the biggest failure is not learning from your mistakes. So, to help you uncover your "blindspots" or habits that keep you from expanding to the best you can be, read these 5 habits that hold you back, and what you can do to overcome them.

The best learned lessons come not from your success, but from your failures. Actually, the biggest failure is not learning from your mistakes.

Mistakes come and go. But certain mistakes remain constant simply because you are circulating the same habits that perpetuate the same mistakes. Then you wonder, “What went wrong” or “Why does this always happen to me?”

The fact is most people turn a blind eye to the habits that cause them trouble. Mainly because they either don’t believe it’s a bad habit, or because they have nothing to put in its place. Humans dislike empty spaces.

So, to help you uncover your "blindspots" or habits that keep you from expanding to the best you can be, read these 5 habits that hold you back, and what you can do to overcome them.

1. Negative thinking. This encompasses everything from "stinkin’ thinkin" to "I am a total failure – useless." Any thought, idea or belief that says you cannot accomplish something is damaging to your quest.

Habit Adjustment: Rid yourself of all self-limiting beliefs. When you hear the voice in your head say, "You’re no good" or "You don’t have the skill for THAT," you need to talk back! Exercise your free speech and contradict that voice until it begins to shut up. Soon you won’t hear it anymore. Then you will be able to focus on achieving and confidently move forward.

1. Procrastination. Everyone struggles with this. Putting things off is aka fear of failure. If you don’t do it in the first place, then nobody can say you failed, right? Procrastination is just another excuse for not moving, thinking or trying.

Habit Adjustment: Get clear on what is preventing you from plowing ahead. Yes, sometimes it requires a plow to get the momentum going. This take guts. You have to address honestly what is in your way, which may mean getting into the nitty gritty of what’s holding you back. What are you unwilling to face?

1. Not following through. Aka laziness. You become an information junkie who doesn’t put things into play. But you "feel good" because you KNOW what to do, yet you just don’t do it.

Habit Adjustment: Get some self-discipline. Take matters into your own hands and practice the cost/reward system. If you don’t get it done, there’s going to be a cost. If you get it done, then there’s going to be a reward. Make your list, and write out the costs and rewards. Circle the ones you can live with, and the ones you can’t live without.

1. Refusing to take advice. There is always someone who does it better and quicker with superior results. if you think you are too big or good to listen to valuable feedback, then you probably deserve to struggle just a bit longer.

Habit Adjustment: Put your pride in the bag and listen up! Find out who has successfully gone before you. Reach out to them. Ask for mentoring. Read the guru’s books. There is always some gold nugget or take away that you can use.

1. Being a victim. This is the pity party. You’re always a day late and a dollar short. Poor you. At least that’s what you’d like everyone to think because then no one will have any expectations of you.

Habit Adjustment: Snap out of it! No one likes to be around a self-proclaimed victim. Start to see yourself as the deserving person you are. Position yourself as an authority on something. Study, research, and learn what will get you from point A to Z – yes, you need to go all the way!

Study your habits – both the good and bad ones. What benefits are you getting from either? Yes, bad habits can have benefits. Unfortunately, they’re either short-term or unhealthy. Create and see the confidence, commitment and courage you were born with every day in the mirror. Tell yourself, "Yes, I have what it takes!"

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