So, youíre ... that you have zero ... to meet men. Are you stuck in an office all day with the same stiffs day in and day out? Have you tried singlesí dances, only to leave feeling wo
So, youíre convinced that you have zero opportunities to meet men. Are you stuck in an office all day with the same stiffs day in and day out? Have you tried singlesí dances, only to leave feeling worse than when you went in? Did the last loser your aunt set you up with squash your Chihuahua when he screeched up the driveway?
Well, donít fret. I have some ideas for you. While advice columnists steer single women into churches to meet honest, loyal, and successful men, I wouldnít dream of it. Church is great for communing with God, but it never struck me as the best place to meet a man. People, including me, are on our best behavior at church. If youíd rather meet a man where heís more likely to be himself, here are my top three recommendations:
1.A bar, specifically during Monday Night Football. Football season is a great time to meet men who flock to taverns to watch the NFL. When I was single, I loved going to Monday Night Football (even though I didnít really understand the game) because the bar was filled with mostly single men, there was a free buffet, and the atmosphere was merry. Advice columnists usually tell women to stay out of bars if they want to meet suitable men, but I disagree. Itís important to see how a man drinks, and how he behaves under the influence of alcohol. Does he get wasted and drive home? Or, does he have a couple of beers and switch to water before he leaves? Does he smack the bartender in the head when his team loses, or does he remain amiable? There are things you can learn in a bar about a man that you never will in church. Bring a friend with you and make having fun, not hooking up, your first priority. You may have to show up three weeks in a row before anybody shows interest in you (or, then again, maybe not). Keep in mind that different bars attract different types of people. If you donít like the crowd in one bar, try another place next time.
2.A class. I know, I know. Youíve heard this one before, but have you ever tried it? Let me tell you a story: My friend Brianís longtime girlfriend dropped him for another guy. After grieving for a while, he dusted himself off and signed up for a cooking class. See, Brian loves to cook, but he put off pursuing formal training while he was with Whatís-Her-Name. Once she was out of the picture, though, he decided to register for a course, figuring heíd meet many likeminded women there. Sure enough, he did. I advise you to write down a list of hobbies youíd like to explore and figure out which of them would also appeal to men. Then sign up for a class or join a club. See what happens.
3.Throw a party. While Brian did meet lots of women at the cooking class, he didnít fall in love with any of them. So he threw a party where he could show off his new skills. He wasnít picky about who he invited and told everybody to bring a friend or two. The result? A woman heíd never met showed up. They fell in love and have been married now for two years. But even if Brian hadnít met his future wife that night, hosting that party netted him plenty of invitations to others, providing opportunities to meet many more people. A caveat: When you plan your party, donít exclude married friends from the guest list. You donít want your big night to feel like a singlesí mixer. Instead, invite couples and encourage them to bring a friend.
Remember, the trick to meeting new men is to break up your routine. Step one: Put down the remote. I assure you that the world is full of great single men like Brian who want to meet someone special, and for one of those men, that person is you. Seek and create new social situations. Act naturally. Smile. Whatever you do, donít keep twisting your neck like youíre casing the place for a live one. Maintain eye contact with whomever youíre talking to, whether itís a man or a woman. Having fun is key. When youíre having fun, youíll attract men like a magnet.
Terry Hernon MacDonald specializes in writing articles about dating and relationships. The author of the ebook, How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams, she has been happily married for 12 years. For more information, please visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com