For a gift my husband bought me a Tiara, ... I have always wanted. I thought having a Tiara would be fun. What I didn't realize is that having a Tiara and wearing a Tiara were too ... thin
For a gift my husband bought me a Tiara, something I have always wanted. I thought having a Tiara would be fun. What I didn't realize is that having a Tiara and wearing a Tiara were too different things. Wearing a Tiara takes much more courage than I ever realized. I decided that wearing a Tiara is like being in training, hence I have started calling it "Tiara Training." I call it training because of how much I am learning about myself and about others.
Being in "Tiara Training," has helped me discover a lot about life. First, let me dispel the myth that it is easy to wear a tiara in public. It isn't. Wearing a tiara makes one different and being different is not easy. When we are different, we don't fit in. By standing out, we can actually make other people uncomfortable. What I have come to realize is that most people want to be different like everyone else. They are afraid to stand out and be separate from the majority. Wearing a tiara has proven to be a great way to learn about diversity and what it is like to be different.
There are days when it is easier to wear a tiara than others. I can't always pull it off. Wearing a tiara requires that I have total self-confidence. It requires that I believe in myself enough not to care what other people think or say. I have to ignore the stares and smirks and the occasional rude comment. When wearing a tiara, I have to think enough of me not to care what others think.
Wearing a tiara requires bravery. I did not realize this until three ladies followed me into the restroom at a local restaurant. They cornered me and asked point blank, "so what's up with the tiara?" I found this somewhat amusing and answered honestly,"nothing, I am just wearing it because I like to." They were amazed and astonished. They were sure it was a special occasion or perhaps my birthday. When they realized I was just wearing it because I wanted to, they said in unison, "you are so brave." One of the women told me she would never have the guts to do it, but wished she did have that kind of courage.
I have always wanted a tiara just because. I never realized that having one would teach me so many lessons. I thought it would be funny to wear one in public, but what I realized is that being different isn't always amusing. Standing out is uncomfortable. People say and do strange things when we are not like them and it isn't always pleasant. Wearing a tiara has made me realize how difficult it is to be ourselves because we have so many outside influences expecting us to fit in and be "normal."
Thanks to my tiara training, I have begun to look at differences in a whole new light. While dining out for lunch, I noticed a woman sitting next to me. She was in her 50's and had the brightest pink hair I had ever seen. Instead of making any kind of judgment about her, I simply found it amusing and went on. I noticed other people staring at her and a few even made comments, but she went on with her lunch and didn't respond. She was living her life the way she wanted not worrying about what others were thinking.
Wearing a tiara has taught me that being who I am is the most difficult thing I will ever have to do. It is something that takes courage, self-esteem and a thick skin. However, I am also realizing that to be anything less than who I came here to be is so much more painful. The number one lesson I have learned is to simply, "be yourself."
Coach Lee, MS is an Int'l Business & Personal Coach with 17 years of corporate management experience. She is a faculty member at the Univ. of Phoenix, a trainer for CoachU, the Int'l Coach Academy & Colorado Free Univ. She is a published writer & quoted as an expert in coaching. She is currently earning a Doctorate Degree in Applied Management & Decision Sciences, specializing in Business Coaching. http://www.coachlee.com