The Reluctant Handyman

Honey-do lists have long been the bane of some men's existence. Who said that all men-of-the-house have to become the resident handyman or plumbing expert? Just because a person was born male doesn't make him have all of the inherent talents, skills and desire to do household repairs. Let's face it; mechanical ability and fix-it skills are not gender specific. Here are some things to think about:

- If a woman expects her husband or boyfriend to repair everything that breaks down on his weekends or days off, he may begin to form a hard ball of resentment. Living with someone who resents them is not a fun proposition. He may begin to avoid you like the plague. Don't have too high of expectations about what miraculous building projects will spring forth from the guy who would rather be fishing.

- Women can be extremely competent wielding tools. Having one's own set of tools and a home repair manual to refer to can be extremely empowering. Learning to hammer a few nails and unclog a toilet will feed her independence and establish a balance of power in the relationship. It will also give the poor guy a break.

- If a female finds herself in a relationship with a reluctant handyman or plumbing expert, she shouldn't take it personally. If he's not good at home repair tasks, it can be a stressful experience for all. When a man feels incompetent, his masculinity may feel threatened. Males are great at protecting and providing; let them do it in the ways that they choose. Forcing home repair on someone who's inept at it is a breeding ground for crankiness.

- Hire a professional handyman. There are lots of tradespersons out there who would love to utilize their skills on building and repairing components of your home. They may be jacks-of-all-trades or they may be laid off professionals who specialize in one area of expertise like painting, plumbing or roof repair. The current economy has left many craftsmen unemployed and swimming in the pool of entrepreneurship. Look around and you'll see scores of trucks with metallic signs advertising home repair services. There will also be slews of listings online and in the local newspaper listings under "services offered."

Give your significant other and romantic relationship a break by hiring a professional handyman. This will allow more time for fun and adventure on days off for both you and your sweetie. Go on a hot date with your reluctant handyman and make a different kind of honey-do list for him, like: get a backrub, eat my home cooking or watch a DVD with me. You'll both be glad you did.