Do You Have to be Male to Practice Misogyny?
Just because we are women, we should not have to anticipate rudeness and condescension when we go to the lumberyard and hardware store. what can we do to change this?
.... Do you have to be female to be a feminist?
The answer to both is a resounding NO!!
But is it really necessary to Eat Our Own?! I can't tell you how many times I have been treated with abject disregard by BOTH male and female sales clerks (I'm sorry...associates). This is not only really bad business, but extremely bad form people!
I hate to say it, but I have come to expect it from the majority of male clerks/associates. And yet, for some reason I am continuously caught off guard when I get that treatment from women. And my annoyance is exacerbated when I then witness her fall all over herself to cater to the guy that walked up after me.
Have you shared this experience? Even when you have listed off a number of items by description that you could only have recited if you knew what they were for and how to use them, they look at you condescendingly. On one such occasion I was asked just that by a clerk whose hands were softer than my then 5 year old daughters,' and I knew the odds were high that he had never even built a doghouse in his life!
The women do not generally engage in as much dialogue as the men. They have a much briefer format for dismissal, for instance, when I ask if they have a specific item, the retort is a curt, "No". And I have found that standing there looking at her waiting for additional comment, is basically fruitless because nothing gets added to that.
I know, here I am being silly, but I actually expect courteous follow-up verbiage, like..."No, but let me find out for you", or, "No, but I will be happy to look that up for you". Oh, yes...I could enumerate endless options that would fit here nicely after that one word response of "No", but a blog is not supposed to be another book.
Clearly I have not stumbled upon a lumberyard or hardware store that sends its employees to the Nordstrom School of Customer Service! Hell, a guy could go to Nordy's and ask for a bra that fit HIM and they would find him one!
The words "women" and "tools" have been paired together since time immemorial, and people still act like we are trying to pee standing up! or something equally as out of our realm as that, when we have the gall to darken the doorsteps of lumberyards and hardware stores. What is up with this?
I would love to have you relate your experiences and offer me your thoughts on how we work together to turn this around and put a stop to it. I am frankly tired of it! It really is an old worn out bias, don't you agree?
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
L.L. Burton Women Carpenters Coach & Author "Splintering the Plywood Ceiling-A Woman Carpenters View from the Inside" (c) http://www.thewomenstoolshed.com We ARE the Sharpest Tool in the Shed! Encouraging women to overcome their reticence to don their own tools and jump into the male dominated professions in construction. My writings are products of my 30 years as a female carpenter & Life Coaching coaxes their hidden innate abilities to the surface.