The power of visualising how you'd like it to be with your teenagers

"Imagination is absolutely everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions"

Albert Einstein Nobel Prize Winner for Physics

When I discovered the amazing power of visualisation, or the act of creating compelling and vivid pictures in my imagination of how I would like things to be, on the Paul McKenna's "Change Your Life in 7 Days" Seminar, I realised I had come upon a fantastic tool to help you in the often difficult job of raising your kids.

Not many parents have ever really tried or used this simple but really successful tool. Using your imagination helps you tap into your unconscious and you feel as if you have already achieved the goal you have set yourself. Your brain actually sees no difference between visualising something and actually having done it.

All successful people from Tony Robbins, Tiger Woods to Anthony Hopkins create things twice - first in their imagination and then in reality. Olympic athletes use it all the time and the legendary golfer Jack Nicklaus with over 100 career titles to his name used visualisation all the time.

So, let's look at how this simple tool can help you in creating the relationships you want with your kids and help you with your discipline, your communication or with your own confidence.

Just relax and breathe deeply and slowly and find a time when you won't be disturbed and close your eyes and just start to visualise or imagine a goal you want to achieve with your family.

Perhaps you could imagine talking to your teenage son about his coming in late and see and hear yourself telling him how you worry when he's not rung to tell you what's delayed him.

Imagine everything going really well - see what you see and notice your body language - notice your breathing - notice the words you are using and how you are saying them and imagine everything flowing naturally and easily when it's going just how you want it to go.

Keep running through this scenario a few times until it feels really good, really easy and really achievable and take the sounds, pictures and feelings back with you into the present and open your eyes.

It's a great idea to set aside a regular time each day to visualise or imagine a goal you want to achieve with your kids as it becomes a natural and easy habit to embrace - a great time is last thing at night just before you fall asleep so your unconscious mind can keep on fine- tuning the goal while you are asleep and while you dream.

Have fun playing around with this idea and watch your relationships gently change for the better!