Gordon Chandler

Is Your Love Life a Victim of National Breakup Season...Reconcile By Valentine's Day

Winter can be such a miserable time of the year.  After all the Christmas presents are open all you have to look forward to is short, dark, dreary days until springtime.   And if you are unfortunate your live life will take a turn for the worse and you won't have anyone to snuggle with.  If you want you can inoculate yourself against the breakups and still be kissing and hugging when daylight savings rolls around!

If the morning after New Year’s Eve found you alone and wondering what happened to your love life then you could be a victim of National Breakup Season.  This is the time of year between the December holidays and Valentines Day when people are more than twice as likely to think about pulling the plug on their love relationships. Consider the stress and hustle and bustle of Thanksgiving and Christmas and you realize why. Then add into this mix all of those New Years resolutions it becomes very clear why couples cease to be an “item”!

Christmas is over and individuals think about all the changes they want to make in the coming year.  “Lose weight” and “save more money” are right up there with “find a better job” and all of them are right next to “find a new love”. Relationships in trouble tend to stay together during the holidays for the companionship.  However as soon as the party is over…BOOM! Somebody gets dumped.          .

If you are the one dumped you probably cannot claim ignorance unless you have been living in a complete vacuum!  Usually the signs are right out there…if your partner has been avoiding you more than usual then there was a reason?  If your phone calls have not been returned in a timely manner this was a hint!  It is possible that you were totally ignorant of this impending doom until the last minute but your reaction needs to be swift.

Unless you agree with your lovers decision and do not want to continue as a couple then you need to get busy.  If you believe this is the love of your life and you don’t want to be without them the worst thing you can do is sit on the sidelines.  Take a day or two to get your wits together and then develop a plan for reconciliation.  Problems always need solutions and the longer you wait to reclaim your relationship the deeper the chasm 

(1)Provide Some Space.  While this may initially seem counterproductive it is not.  Although you definitely need to be proactive this will take longer than overnight.  Realize that whatever caused the rift is still with your partner and they probably need more time to think out their position. Rebuilding will take time but if you remain confident you stand a better chance!

(2) Do Not Ask Your Partner For Reasons.  Come on.  You were in this relationship as long as the other person was and if there are reasons for a split you must be aware of them, even if you do not want to admit it.  This is the time you accept your mistakes and decide to work them out.

(3) Be Creative.  Unless you both are complete idiots there are qualities that drew you together.  This is the time to remember the fun you had early on and find something along the same line to draw you back together again.  The key here is to come up with ideas that will rekindle that fire and make you both remember why you fell in love in the first place!

Guess what?  Valentines Day is quickly approaching and may give you an edge for reconciliation.  So if you can balance creativity with speed and at the same time allow your partner that “space” then things could again be quite interesting.  Need a little help with some techniques or ideas to pull this off?  You might want to check out Pull Your ex Back and see what is offered there.  Above all remember that if you do nothing then you definitely will be alone for quite awhile.  Relationships have been pulled back together in relatively short periods before and yours just might make the record books!

Article Tags: Love Life

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