If you have issues about commitment, share them with your lover. Explain to your partner what your commitment means.
Completely CommittedTime for Exercise: 15 minutesProperties Required: noneSteps:1. Explain to your partner what your commitment means.2. Give evidence that supports your statement and shows your commitment. Below are examples of evidence that commitment is real. The items on this list are not all required. They are examples to help get the exercise going. Each couple will express their commitment in their own way. There are no rules about commitment. The most important thing about commitment is that you are in agreement about it. For example, in some relationships, neither partner is ready for 100% commitment.Merging of financesNames on property titlesShared bank accountsBeneficiaries in wills and insurance policiesLegal marriageHaving or adopting childrenSleeping togetherFidelityPersonal sacrifices on the other’s behalfGiving up something you want so your lover can have what he wantsAdmitting when you are wrong rather than always trying to win every argumentAsking: “How can I help?”Offering: “Let me do that for you.”Confiding in your lover when you are hurting or afraidAdmitting: “I don’t know.”Asking for what you wantSaying “yes” whenever you can, and “no” when you mustTrying new things togetherSurviving hardshipTrust—for example, when the evidence makes your partner look bad, you know: “That can’t be all the evidence.”Not putting up with your partner’s bullshit, but calling her on it (in a loving way)Forgiving your lover when he has made a mistakeTreating him with kindness, respect, and fairnessComments:If you have issues about commitment, share them with your lover. Explain any fears and doubts you have about your willingness or ability to give your commitment. Also talk about your intention to work through these issues together.
Excerpted from our new book Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms of Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, Llewellyn, 2007
4 Freedoms Integration Exercise - Under the Sky
Know that you are part of this wondrous vastness. The universe or cosmos contains everything that exists. The universe is believed to "vibrate" out of "strings." According to Dan Falk, "Each string is as small compared to an atom as an atom is compared to the solar system."
4 Freedoms Integration Exercise - What's Good?
Generally your consciousness works to create more of what you pay attention to. Be careful what you pay attention to because you are going to get more of it.
4 Freedoms Integration Exercise - Seeing in the Dark
This exercise forces you to rely on senses other than sight. You might be amazed at how much you rely on sight for so many things. You might also be amazed at how many things you can do for yourself without being able to see.
