Navigating the Equestrian Show Circuit: A Parent's Guide to Success and Resilience

Apr 3
13:37

2024

Kathy Keeley

Kathy Keeley

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Embarking on the equestrian show circuit is a journey filled with challenges, triumphs, and invaluable lessons. As a parent supporting your child through this competitive landscape, you'll encounter a myriad of experiences that test your resolve and adaptability. From unexpected disasters to the nuances of show politics, each moment is an opportunity for growth. Here are ten essential lessons gleaned from years on the circuit, offering a roadmap for navigating the highs and lows with grace and determination.

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The Unpredictable Nature of Competition

Lesson 1: Embrace Flexibility Amidst Chaos

Our family's journey on the A Circuit in the Southeast,Navigating the Equestrian Show Circuit: A Parent's Guide to Success and Resilience Articles including prestigious events like the Capital Challenge and National Horse Show in Wellington, was marked by an unforgettable incident: an RV fire at the Gulfport show. This disaster forced us into a nomadic existence, moving from motel to motel with smoke-scented belongings. Despite the upheaval, my daughter emerged as a champion that weekend, demonstrating remarkable focus and resilience.

Key Takeaway: Life will throw curveballs; the ability to adapt and persevere is crucial.

Lesson 2: Confronting Injustice and Disappointment

At the Nationals in 2003, my daughter's success was overshadowed by a shocking revelation. Despite being named reserve champion, a later issue of the Chronicle of the Horse listed another competitor in her place. Our inquiries were met with dismissiveness, teaching us a harsh lesson about the realities of competition.

Key Takeaway: The equestrian world can be unfair; it's vital to prioritize integrity over accolades.

Lesson 3: Safety and Support in Times of Crisis

A harrowing fall during competition led to my daughter being taken from the ring on a backboard. Despite the severity of the incident, the response from show officials was cold and bureaucratic, focused more on reclaiming ribbons than providing support.

Key Takeaway: In the face of accidents, a community's compassion is as important as its rules.

Lesson 4: Coping with Human Error

After months of preparation for a major equitation class, a judge's oversight cost my daughter a top spot. The judge's admission of the mistake was a small consolation for the lost opportunity, but it reinforced the importance of focusing on the quality of the ride over the pursuit of prizes.

Key Takeaway: Judges are fallible; the true reward lies in the pursuit of excellence, not just winning.

Building Strong Relationships

Lesson 5: Forging a Partnership Beyond Parenting

The show circuit has transformed our mother-daughter dynamic into a partnership built on mutual respect and clearly defined roles. This foundation has set the stage for a lasting adult relationship.

Key Takeaway: Collaborative teamwork can strengthen familial bonds in high-pressure environments.

Lesson 6: Trusting the Trainer-Child Team

As a parent, it's essential to respect the professional relationship between your child and their trainer. Interference can undermine their efforts and the trust they've built.

Key Takeaway: Step back and allow the trainer to guide your child's development.

Understanding the Show Ecosystem

Lesson 7: Recognizing the True Customer

It became apparent that horse show managers and secretaries view trainers, not parents, as their primary clients. This realization helped me navigate the show circuit with a clearer perspective on my role.

Key Takeaway: Accepting the business dynamics of horse shows can alleviate frustration and confusion.

Lesson 8: Navigating the Politics of Judging

The equestrian show world is rife with political undercurrents, often influencing judging decisions. Accepting this reality allows competitors to focus on their performance rather than the politics.

Key Takeaway: Encourage riders to concentrate on their skills and experiences, rather than external factors.

Parental Influence and Sportsmanship

Lesson 9: Managing Expectations and Behavior

Observing parents' intense focus on winning highlighted the need for a healthier approach. It's crucial to support our children's efforts and maintain a positive atmosphere at competitions.

Key Takeaway: Parents should model composure and encouragement, emphasizing the journey over the outcome.

Lesson 10: Upholding Standards of Conduct

Sportsmanship is a non-negotiable standard in the competitive arena. It's imperative to instill courtesy and respect in young riders, ensuring they honor the sport and its participants.

Key Takeaway: Good sportsmanship is a cornerstone of character development and should be consistently modeled and expected.

In retrospect, would I undertake this adventure again? Without hesitation. The circuit has been a crucible for growth, teaching my daughter the value of hard work, goal-setting, and the discipline required of an athlete.

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