Stop Sabotaging Yourself and Get Into Action!

Whenever we step into something new or take on something we’ve never done before, it’s not uncommon to experience fear. It could be the fear of failure, fear of rejection, or fear of success. The fear can manifest itself in different ways that we’re not always aware of. Some signs of hidden fear are: Procrastination, distraction, excuses, feeling stuck, feeling overwhelm, negative beliefs, worried, and anxious.

Let me share a story of a client and how she dealt with her fear. Maybe you’ll see yourself in this story.

Christina came to me because she had started a new business, and was not taking the steps to get it off the ground. She’s extremely talented and had huge success in her corporate position. She had enough of the corporate world and was eager to start her own business. She had no problem creating new ideas for her boss and presenting to vendors, but when it came to promoting herself and her business to others, suddenly she was stuck.

Christina had made a list of people to contact. These were people she knew and could possibly help her. When I asked her why she wasn’t following up with these people, her response was, “Well, they told me they would call me and since they never returned my calls, I assumed they’re not interested.” I asked her, “Did they tell you they’re not interested?” She responded “No, I just assumed they weren’t interested since they didn’t call back.”

In reality, she didn’t know why they weren’t calling her back. She had made up a story and was stopped because she believed her story was true. Christina was transferring her own thoughts, beliefs and perceptions onto these people. And, the more she listened to her own thoughts, the more she believed they were true.

I suggested to Christina there might be others reasons they’re not calling her back. They could be either busy or away.

She realized these excuses and reasons for not calling these people were also covering up her fear of rejection. What if they don’t want to help me? What if they’re not interested? As long as she believed these thoughts to be true, nothing would change and her business would suffer.

Once she distinguished her fear of failing was a self-imposed negative belief and not the truth, she began to feel freed up. The fear no longer had to keep her stopped. She knew she had created these self-limiting thoughts and they were not true. We then created a step-by-step plan and she got into action. What followed was amazing!

She contacted all the people on her list, has nearly completed her website, and started sending out letters introducing her services. The positive responses she received from people she had reached out to helped her to feel more confident and gave her more clarity on the direction of her business. And, the best news is two companies she had contacted have expressed interest in hiring her. These results happened when Christina identified the fear that had been holding her back, realized she had created the negative thoughts and changed her thoughts, created an action plan, and then got into action.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT:

• When you feel stopped, step away from your office and spend quiet time with yourself.

• Write down all the thoughts you’re having at this time.

• Then ask yourself, “Did I make up these thoughts or did someone tell me these thoughts are true?”

• Write down the answer next to each thought. You’ll see that many of these thoughts are made up by you.

• Write down the steps you can take NOW to get you into action.

• Visualize yourself being in action and how it feels.

• Write down the date you will take action and the outcome you want to achieve. (Example: I will call Jim on Monday and he will be happy to hear from me, or will have someone to refer me to.)

(c) Rochelle Togo-Figa.