Destroy Approach Anxiety

Jan 11 09:20 2010 Dan Silverman Print This Article

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It can be pretty terrifying to approach a beautiful woman you haven’t met before and try to get a date with her. This fear can cause us to creep her out or worse,Guest Posting not approach her at all. You can learn all the fancy pick up lines and techniques you want, but what good is it if you’re sweating and shaking? You must learn how to destroy approach anxiety.

One of the best ways to destroy approach anxiety is by expanding your comfort zone. Most of your fears of approaching are due to the fact that either you’re not used to it or you’ve never done it before. You must systematically expose yourself to the very thing that causes you anxiety and pull through. Yes, this means you have to approach and expose yourself to rejection, the very thing you fear happening. There is no easy quick fix out of this.

You can start small. Approach women asking for directions, the best place to have lunch around the area, or any other kind of functional opener. Then, work your way up to opinion openers and ask them for their advice. You don’t need to get their number, just approach. The more approaches you do, the easier it will be. Finally, you can graduate to direct openers where you tell a woman that you approached her because you think she is beautiful and you want to find out what she is like. Gradually, you can overcome your approach anxiety and start asking for numbers.

Also try getting yourself rejected by asking ridiculous questions like, “Hey, I’m looking to pick up hot chicks today, do you know where I should go to do that?” or “My grandma is coming in town this weekend, but she can’t stay at my place unfortunately. Can she stay with you?” By doing this, you turn the act of getting rejected into something fun.

You must also figure out why you have approach anxiety. If you’ve heard that it’s hardwired into us from caveman days, you’re being lied to. The reason why you have approach anxiety is because of insecurities and irrational beliefs. Ask yourself why you are afraid. For example, if you want to destroy approach anxiety when a woman is with guy friends, you would ask yourself, “Why do I fear approaching women with guy friends?” Usually you will find it’s a ridiculous reason like, “I may get beat up by the guys” or “I may offend the group.” This is almost always untrue. You have to convince yourself the opposite is true. If you approach a woman with guy friends in a friendly manner instead of a sleazy manner, then there’s no reason they would be offended or you would get beat up. This is how to overcome approach anxiety.

You owe it to yourself to overcome approach anxiety. To learn more about how to destroy approach anxiety, check out dating coach Dan Silverman’s ebook The Seven Steps to Inner Game Power.

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About Article Author

Dan Silverman
Dan Silverman

Dan Silverman is a dating coach based out of Miami. He has been seen on MTV's MADE, My33, and CBS4. He is also the author of the book, The Seven Steps to Inner Game Power.

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