Getting What You Want Most From Other People

Very often in relationships we do not seem to be
able to get the one thing we want more than
anything else - the approval of other people.
In fact the more we want it the more difficult
it can be to turn the situation around.

Typical approaches include withdrawing from
other people so that only those who are really
interested in you will make the effort to get
to know you. The other person takes on all the
risk of rejection and you risk not having
someone make the effort to approach you.

Emotionally what you really want is for the
other person to like you or to approve of you
as you are. In effect you project wanting
approval and that is what you get - more
wanting approval! This is because what you give out
comes back to you in this world. However
there is a better way!

It is possible to let go of wanting approval if
you know the right questions to ask yourself,
then you will be able to release the neediness
and instead feel your own approval of yourself
which then causes others to reflect that acceptance
back to you.

Ask yourself, which would I rather have,
wanting approval or having approval? Ask
this question again and again even for up to
ten minutes at a time and you will find that
your feelings shift and you will feel better
about yourself and less attached to getting
approval from other people.

Test this for yourself when you are alone as
well as when you are with other people. I find
that my breathing changes and I start to feel
more at peace within minutes when I use this
approach. Enjoy!