One of the biggest heartaches for someone who found out about their spouse's emotional affair is the haunting images of their spouse's lover, playing like a horror-movie in their head.
It's not unusual to carry around these images in your mind, but it is possible to get rid of them. In the next paragraph you will learn 3 steps that will give you the strength to stop he haunting images so you are able to regain your normal life while healing your shattered emotions .
Dealing With The Pain of Post-Emotional Affair Images
First of all, you need to understand that eventually, the affect these images have on you is not permanent. The horror film inside your mind will finish, and your life will go on.
However, in the early stages--when you have just found out about your spouse's emotional affair--is where it hurt the most. There is no need for you to know any specific details to get the horror movie to start playing. You, as lots of other injured ones will create parts of the movie yourself in heart-rending detail.
The only thing that you are sure of is that your spouse is having an affair, and probably a few other uncertain details. But that won't necessarily stop you from having images that include:
1. A picture of the other person as being perfectly attractive, funny, charming, etc.
2. Both of them hugging, kissing--and more intimate scenarios.
3. Your spouse gazing at the other person in a way they've never looked at you.
4. The other person being treated better and valued more than your spouse has ever treated or valued you.
The haunting of these images are truly disturbing, viscously devouring your focus on life, evoking nightmares in your restless sleep and altogether drowning you in depression.
Everything you imagine is apparently a good illustration of every emotions that you are also experiencing, which include fear, distrust and betrayed. The haunting images and the negative emotions start to feed into one another, forming an abuse cycle that will leave you feeling totally drained.
This is the rollercoaster of emotions so many victims of an emotional affair are talking about. Ultimately, this can derail any efforts or strides you've attempted to make to survive the affair and save your marriage. You are just too exhausted..
Stop the Emotional Drain of Haunting Images
As the cycle of recurring images and negative emotions drain you, you begin to feel more vulnerable and find the images even more difficult to escape. The further down you go, the longer it takes to climb back out.
From wherever you're starting from today, it's going to take a big push on your part to stop the cycle. But remember: you own your mind, and only you have the power to take charge of it. The following steps will help you regain that power over your own mind, while eliminating the power of those haunting images:
Step 1: Put the Haunting Pictures on the Clock
To start the process of regaining the power of your mind, set a specific time in a day and only let the images come to you during this period.. This might not work every time, but if an image begins to come up at a time outside of the set schedule, remind yourself that it's not time for haunting images yet.
This exercise will help you to start managing what will be allowed to come into your mind, and the appropriate time for it to be there. It is a shift that not immediately obvious, but can give absolute power to your mind. Think of it as standing up to a bully.
Step 2: In the Specified Time, Allow the Images to Appear
If needed, imagine yourself opening a door and greeting those images. Let the images troop in wearing whatever form they want. You are only temporarily tolerating these unwanted guests, and at the end of the designated time, you can push them back out the door. But not before you have had some fun at their expense.
Step 3: Rewind the Image
Take one of the images, and pretend it's on a movie reel. Start at the end, and imagine the whole scene running backwards. By doing this you are toying with the structure of the image, which may help you feel better because you will feel that you have the power to manipulate the image however you want to. You will realize that the image is nothing more than a conceit of your mind and you have the power to determine what to do with it.
Again, you will need some time to take charge over these haunting images, but the result will help you in the healing process of your shattered emotions.
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