Be a Model: Reveal Your Essence

As part of a workshop assignment, I was recently asked to
identify 3 qualities that I would choose to model for
others. Within a very few moments, I had my answer:
compassion, respect, and wholeness. This reverberated with
me so strongly that I soon realized that if I were able to
live these three qualities to their fullest expression, I
would be 'in' integrity with the essence of my being.
These were the very heart of my core values and talked
louder of who I am than anything I had come across before.
Stronger than I can remember, they seem to answer the
question of Who Am I? and Why am I here?

I soon experimented with some of my clients. Their answers
included: (1) sharing, self-expression, intelligence; (2)
dedication, loyalty, intelligence and (3) creativity, love,
enthusiasm. All different. All extremely expressive of the
individuals who chose them. In each case, the answers took
just a few moments to come up with. In each case, the
individual involved felt that this was the essence of who
they were. They also felt energized and powerful.

This is one of those exciting discoveries that I want to
share with everyone. No matter what you're struggling
with, getting in touch with those three qualities seems to
have the effect of lifting you above the situation. It
lifts you up to a place where alternatives - choices - are
visible. And once we're in choice, we stop being victims
and claim the power to create the reality we want.

So, start with the question. What three qualities do you
want to model for others? Once you've identified your
three, write them down and post them prominently. Refer to
them often. Go through your day seeking to express them
each to their fullest. Pay attention to those activities
that are most in harmony with those qualities. Notice when
in the past you've most been in alignment with them. Do
you get to express them in your work? In your family? Who
can you express them around? And who not? Start noticing
when all three get expressed together. For example, thinking
about my three (compassion, respect, wholeness), I
understood why I am so passionate about coaching. It is
such a natural opportunity for me to get to express these
core attributes - and myself.

I hope you'll try this simple exercise. Of course, this is
one of those 'simple, but not easy' things. Identifying
the three qualities is simple, but living them fully each
day may be one of the most challenging endeavors you ever
undertake.